Keep Them Busy

Mule Medicine

To cure a cold, kiss a mule.

I'd hate to think what you'd have to do for a fever.

Boney Dreams

Dreaming of a skeleton on display may signify new, fascinating friends or coming events.

Or, it could mean you've got a hankerin' for some ribs.

Halloween Tang Toungler

Try saying this tongue tangler three times fast:

"Which witch wished which wicked witch?"

Animals Chasing Lasers

TWI - Talking While Intoxicated

From the     archives

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Indubitably

Innovative

Preliminary

Proliferation

Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Specificity

British Constitution

Passive-aggressive disorder

Loquacious

Transubstantiation


THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

"Thanks, but I don't want to have sex"

"Nope, no more booze for me"

"Sorry, but you're not really my type"

"Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?"

"Oh I couldn't, nobody wants to hear me sing...."

The Monster - Simon's Cat

Falcon Belly Dance

Meet The New Baby!

Animals in Mirrors

Living in 2016

From the archives.

---

YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2016 when...

1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries...

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic, and you turn around to go and get it .

10. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list .

The Head of Bob

Pray Before the Head of 'Bob'

From the website:

The Ultimate Oracle: Over 1625038 Questions Answered

Of the many True Oracles, none are more profound than the Mystical Smoking Head of 'Bob'. Not even the Severed Head of Arnold Palmer can penetrate the veils of bulldada protecting the Norms from the Terrifying Truths and Puzzling Evidence.

Concentrate and ask a Yes or No Question

Oh By The Frop Of His Pipe, Grant Me Vision!

With the recent death of Arnold Palmer, I'm wondering if they'll change that particular gruesome reference.  Probably not, though.

I asked Bob if I will win the lottery:

(click for larger view)

Startled Cats Compilation

The Worm Didn't Turn

Cute 404 page on The Food Channel:

I was a little disappointed I wasn't able to find the recipe for Chicken Alfredo Soup right away, but I guess it's like real life; it's better to bite into an apple and find a worm than biting into one and finding half a worm.

Difficult to Prove

Man, these "prove you're a human" things are getting harder and harder.   I had to go find my glucose meter for this one.

Cukes Cause Pukes

A little too close together in my Facebook news feed:

Instant Rimshot

From the site: If you need quick access to an ironically-placed rimshot sound to mock your friends, or a genuinely-placed rimshot to put your great joke over the top, you've come to the right place

Squidbillies Theme Song

While I've done a few reviews of movies and TV shows, I keep meaning to do more, but to be honest, they take a lot of time and especially if I want them to be truly original and worth reading.

I used to watch Squidbillies when I had cable, then thought the show had been cancelled, so I was surprised to see the newest episodes online. I've been d/l them to watch on my tablet and while it's not as funny now as it was when I first started watching it, it's still good for a grin now 'n then.

My favorite part is the theme song; this one is done by Billy Jo Shaver and is, IMHO, the best of all the renditions.  The lyrics match how I feel much of the time these days.

While I'm WAY behind on writing reviews, it's given me an idea for an easier topic/label to start doing: Theme Songs.

The Big Hurt

I was looking for a specific bit of baseball trivia and a Google search lead me to Sports on Earth, but the link didn't work and I got this instead:

(click pic for larger view)

I DID manage to find an answer to my question.  Tom Glavin.

All About That Bass