Two So True

You don't have to fool all the people all of the time; you just have to fool enough to get elected.
~ Gerald Barzan

Get the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything.
~ Frank Dane

Behind the Name

From the website:

Names. Everyone has one, most people have a vague idea what their own means, but few give them much more thought. The study of names is called onomastics, a field which touches on linguistics, history, anthropology, pyschology, sociology, philology and much more.

When people refer to the "meaning of a name", they are most likely referring to the etymology, which is the original literal meaning. This website looks at the etymology and history or all types of given names.

Michael

From the Hebrew name מִיכָאֵל (Mikha'el) meaning "who is like God?". This is a rhetorical question, implying no person is like God. Saint Michael was one of the seven archangels in Hebrew tradition and the only one identified as an archangel in the Bible. In the Book of Revelation in the New Testament he is portrayed as the leader of heaven's armies, and thus is considered the patron saint of soldiers.

The popularity of the saint led to the name being used by nine Byzantine emperors, including Michael VIII Palaeologus who restored the empire in the 13th century. It has been common in Western Europe since the Middle Ages, and in England since the 12th century. It has been borne (in various spellings) by rulers of Russia (spelled Михаил), Romania (Mihai), Poland (Michał), and Portugal (Miguel). Other more modern bearers of this name include the British chemist/physicist Michael Faraday (1791-1867) and basketball player Michael Jordan (1963-)

Astronomical or Economical

There are 10¹¹ stars in the galaxy. That used to be a huge number. But it's only a hundred billion. It's less than the national deficit! We used to call them astronomical numbers. Now we should call them economical numbers.
- Richard Feynman

Irina, You Scheme-a!

Hello.

Please, do not be surprise - this letter is not a spam one.

You will probably be amazed of the fact that I am writing you an e-mail. Yesterday I myself was amazed too, when saw your letter in my e-mail box. The letter was about love and sensations among people. The motto of the letter was like this search for love and you ll become happy. I liked this letter very much. There was a list of e-mails where I found yours. I decided to write you. Maybe you are seeking love too? Maybe it s our destiny?

I do not know actually who was the person that had sent me that e-mail and how did he get my e-mail address. I think it is not important. The most amazing thing is that I can write you. I would like to know more about you. Providing that it is me who is the first to write, I want to say some words of my personality.

My name is Irina. I am 30 years old. I have never been married and have no children. I am cute, calm, kind and sociable. I think it is interesting to talk with you and discover new features of yours Discover you as a person. I am a serious woman and I am looking for serious relations. For me it means no deception, no double jokes. I am looking for a real person who will manage to love and respect me. I hope you are searching for your love, too.

I do not think that in love-relations age and appearance have any importance. The chief factor for me is ability to love and respect seriously! I have lots of hobbies and interests in life. Among them you will find sport, cooking, books reading and definitely music. I am going crazy about housekeeping and house holding. I like tiding up and general cleaning. I am keen on experimenting in my kitchen. I love changes.

I am fond of animals and prefer to lead a healthy lifestyle, thus, I do not smoke or use alcohol. Hey, my new pen-friend. What can you tell me about yourself? I want to learn more about you. In my future letter I will describe my character and my personality more precisely. Definitely, I will send you some of my photographs. It will help you to understand who I am and where I live. My photos will reveal all parts of my life my happiness, my pensiveness and sometimes melancholy.

Please reply only to my personal e-mail: lovelykitty1978@gmail.com

I am looking forward to your reply. I am really interested in knowing you better.

Remember of me.
Your new friend,
Irina.



Dear Irina,

The last time you wrote me, your name was Anastasiya. What's up with that?

Thanks for the photo, though. I particularly like them with less clothes. You can keep sending these mails if you put in pics like the one above and I don't even care if you're lying about your name.

Regards,
Mike

P.S. I'm annoyed that I forgot to put in your "real" address. Oh well, I'm sure I'll get another one or two or three or four hundred from you where I'll get a chance to look into the "details" and get the address from which it really came so I can publish it and get the spambots to deluge your inbox. For the meantime, I'll have to use this one: lovelykitty1978@gmail.com that you want poor slobs like me to reply to. Well, poor slobs like me, just more desperate and dumber.

Balldroppings

BallDroppings

BallDroppings instructions:

Turn your sound up.
Draw lines on the black screen to bounce the balls.
Enjoy the music.

longueur

longueur \long-GUR\, noun:
A dull and tedious passage in a book, play, musical composition, or the like.

---

Almost every post in this blog is a longueur, especially when I waffle on about something.

I could make my posts less lengthy, but then they'd just be a shortueur longueur.

Dreams

Oh, I hope not. Especially not the dreams I have after drinking a couple of beers along with eating some pickled okra and sardines covered in hot sauce and horseradish. If my dreams ARE the best guide to the future, then I can look forward to 6 foot tall tap-dancing talking cats that drive motorcycles.

Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) - Eurythmics



Annie Lennox has been the subject of a few of my better dreams. I dream in color...I know, because I remember her tangerine marine haircut.

I'm glad I don't dream of Patsy Cline, even though she was beautiful.

Sweet Dreams - Patsy Cline



More dreamy gals:

These Dreams - Heart



I'd like to add Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams" because I've had several dreams about Stevie Nicks (and wish I'd had some with Christine McVie) or The Cranberry's "Dreams". I could go on and on with this dream theme scheme but....

Regifting Robin

Follow the instructions, make sure your math is correct and be absolutely amazed at Re-gifting Robin's psychic abilities!

You'll be amazed until you do it twice and take a closer look at the re-gifts.

Regifting Robin

Olga on the Volga II

Hello,

I don’t know how to start this letter. So... My name is Olga. I want to have a pen-friend very much and may be in due course it might to turn out in something more than friendship. I live in central part of Russia and I want to find out my beloved in other country. I am not interested in relationships with Russian men so I meet only pain in these relationships. I have a friend who works in the dating agency and she helps me in a search of the man. When I have seen your profile, I liked you very much and I decided that I will write to you necessarily.

I put my photo to this email that you could see me. If you are interested in communication with me, I hope you will find out some time to write me something. I will answer you necessarily and tell you a little bit more about me.

Please reply only to my personal email: fireinmyheartm@gmail.com


I will be very happy if you would answer to me.



Dear Olga,

Thanks for your email. You're prettier than the last Olga who wrote me but while the photos change, the message is still pretty much the same.

I'm not sure where you saw my profile unless it was here on Blogger.

(and if you like my profile pic in it, then you've got a problem. OTOH, if you live near Chernobyl, then that might explain your attraction. )

You state you "meet only pain" with your Russian men; pardon me, but I'm curious....it's not a "whips and chains" sorta deal, is it?

I'D have to be a masochist to really reply to your mail, that's for sure.

Regards,
Mike

P.S. Here's your real address. Hope the spammers cause you some pain.

stw@omron.com.sg

Color My World

Or "Colour" for my UK and other friends who spell it that way

You Color Your Life With Intense Warmth

You are a down to earth, stable person. You can be relied on. You enjoy the outdoors. There's something about being in nature that makes you feel really blissful. While you are responsible, you aren't boring. You have a lot of flair and style. You enjoy creative projects of all sorts. You're a very visual person.

How Do You Color Your Life?

Color My World - Chicago

The Anti-Fortune

That's so funny (and wrong) I don't even know what to say.

namechk

From the website:

Check to see if your desired username or vanity url is still available at dozens of popular Social Networking and Social Bookmarking websites. Promote your brand consistently by registering a username that is still available on the majority of the most popular sites. Find the best username with namechk.

Below is a screenshot where I checked for "mikeintexas", my own nom de plume in Groups and in Blogger. I know there was someone else before and several afterwards, according to Google searches I've done on the nickname.

Click the pic for a larger view.



namechk

ToTG is Closing!

Due to my having little time to spend on this blog, I regret to inform my faithful readers that I'm going to have to close this site.

Thanks to everyone and I appreciate all the posts and (almost all the) emails I have received.

Regards,
Mike



P.S.




Myspace April Fools Day Graphics

ʎʇʇıʞ uɐǝɯ - sǝıʇʇıʞ uʍop ǝpısdn

Mean Kitty Upside down.

YouTube's idea of an April Fool's joke.

This Google search isn't:

Funny Food Fortune

I had a hot dog with onions on a white bread bun tonight.

Guess that means I'm a weenie with bad breath and high blood sugar.

Peace of Mind Prescription

From the email archives:

---

An elderly woman went to her local doctor’s office and asked to speak with her doctor. When the receptionist asked why she was there, she replied,

“I’d like to have some birth control pills.”

Taken back, the doctor thought for a minute and then said,

“Excuse me, ma'am, but you’re 80 years old. What would you possibly need birth control pills for?”

The woman replied,

“They help me sleep better.”

The doctor considered this for a second, and continued…

“How in the world do birth control pills help you sleep?”

The woman said,

“I put them in my granddaughter’s orange juice, and I sleep better at night."

25 Years Ago Today

Marvin Gaye was killed.

RIP

I Heard it Through the Grapevine

Happiness is Nearby

Yeah, and he just turned up his nose at his breakfast. Darn cat.

I dunno if that's the happiness my fortune is talking about. Also next to me is a bottle of premium tequila I bought a couple of years ago for a present and put away and just found again the other day. If that's the happiness, then tomorrow's fortune will read "You feel like crap."

I usually post only the music I like, but today's fortune made me think of this song, IMO the worst song the Beatles ever did.

Happiness is a Warm Gun

Dear Whoever

Hello! I looked through your profile at e-kontakte.se and decided to write you a message and tell I am intersted in you. I'm sure that you are very intelligent and nice person. It would be great to learn more about you! I'm sure we can find something in common and begin a long a beautiful story.I'm looking only for serious relationship, I'm tired of games and dishonesty. I'm ready to give all my love and tenderness to a right man. Maybe that is you? Nobody knows!

I hope you are also interested in communicating with me! Looking forward to hearing from you! Please reply only to my personal e-mail: krasatulechka2009@gmail.com



Dear Whoever You Are,

(you didn't give a name, except for the photo; is your name "MyPhoto"???")

Let's keep this short and sweet, ok? I never left a profile at the site you mentioned; the last time I signed up for a matchmaking service they tried to hook me up with my cousin.

A "long and beautiful story" is what you want, huh? Like a fairy tale? Know the difference between a fairy tale and a Texas tall tale? The fairy tale starts out like this: "Once upon a time..." and the Texas tall tale begins "Now, this ain't no BS..."

So, if you're tired of "games and dishonesty", why are you acting crooked as a dog's hind leg?

You got one thing correct: I am a "right man". I suggest, however, that you look for a "left" one and lower your standards on "nice and intelligent" because them sunuvabitches will sleep with anybody and are stupid enough to fall for your scam.

Sincerely,
Mike

P.S. Here's your "real" address: avalotor@serialsys.com.sg

Here's hopin' the spambots pick up on it and deluge your email account.

THAT ain't no BS.

Typical CEO

From the email archives:

---

If you've ever worked for a boss that reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will love this!

One corporation, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers..

On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning on a wall.. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business.

He walked up to the guy leaning against the wall and asked, 'How much money do you make a week?'

A little surprised, the young man looked at him and replied, 'I make $400 a week. Why?'

The CEO then handed the guy $1,600 in cash and screamed, 'Here's four weeks pay, now GET OUT and don't come back.'

Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looked around the room and asked, 'Does anyone here want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?'

From across the room came a voice, 'Pizza delivery guy from Domino's.'

The Legend of Old Rip

Legend says a horny toad (a.k.a. horned lizard) named Old Rip survived for decades trapped inside a brick of the courthouse in Eastland, Texas. When he was found alive, Old Rip became an instant celebrity

Uncle Jay Explains (3-30)

With My Luck

It's probably a mortician.

Too Bad

It's staying white

Your Blog Should Be Yellow

You're a cheerful, upbeat blogger who tends to make everyone laugh. You are a great storyteller, and the first to post the latest funny link. You're also friendly and welcoming to everyone who comments on your blog.

What Color Should Your Blog or Journal Be?

---

A few weeks ago I read an article that claimed that blogs should have black backgrounds instead of white because white blogs use more electricity.

In the comments section, someone had said that besides the "green" savings, it was harder for them to read a white background blog. (maybe that's why I don't get many readers) I disagree, at least in my own case; it's always been easier for me to read dark text on a light bg.

I think that reading too MANY blogs, no matter what color they are, is hard on the eyes. I've been culling my own blog list reading down quite a bit here lately and have some more to do.

Other than the color suggestion, I would like to think the rest of the quiz results are spot on. It's what I strive for, anyway. I never wanted to do much in the way of political posting; I've had my fill of that since I first got online, just before the 2000 elections. Nearly ten years of tilting at windmills has jaded me and made me face the fact that even with our votes, we do not control who gets elected. My belief in God has led me to believe that it's out of our hands, that He is the one who controls our national destiny. I don't understand why He is letting these things happen, but I've made up my mind to not worry about it, as He has promised to reveal all mysteries to us someday.

Political posts in here are few and far between and my long-time readers know I am an equal opportunity "josher", namely because I've not yet seen a politician who doesn't deserve some ridicule. In this last election, other than Ron Paul, there wasn't a single candidate of either party who was worthy of the presidency and the good doctor certainly had his own faults. I certainly didn't agree with all of his positions.

Democrat/Republican, there's not a nickle's worth of difference between them. They're only interested in being elected in order to maintain their power and prestige. If they're honest when they get elected, they soon become corrupted, it's the nature of the beast. The best and most honest president we ever had was also the first and he warned us about the two-party system.

Enough political BS:

This blog is about ME and MY likes and dislikes. It's "ego-centric", in other words. I don't see anything wrong with that. The only people I particularly want to stop by are my close friends (both "real" and "online") and family. All I want to do is post photos, talk about cats and other varmits, comment on websites I've visited and things I thought were cool, put in links to free stuff, share the music I like, make light of the Panhandle weather... and the only griping I care to do these days is about the Cowboys.

Oh yeah, and poke some fun at spammers.

The things I post have only one rule of thumb to get published:

Would I be...would I have been...ashamed to let my momma see it?

That's the only Code of Conduct I care about.

Coffee Machine

From the email archives:

---

Coffee Machine

Directions:

1. CLICK HERE
2. PUT THE COIN IN THE VENDING MACHINE
3. CHOOSE YOUR DRINK
4. CLICK ON THE CUP WHEN IT IS READY
5. CLICK ON 'OPEN'

ENJOY!

Don' t forget to click on 'OPEN' !!!

---

From my friend Sharon in Miami

Four Day Forecast

So, what else is new?

An Unforgettable Home Run

Western Oregon Sara Tucholsky hit her first career HR with the help from Central Washington - ultimate sportsmanship. She tore her ACL running back to 1st as she missed it initially. The rules state that if she didn't run the bases by herself, the HR wouldn't count. If her teammates touched her, it would be void.

The opposing team saw her pain and did the unexpected, they picked her up and helped her touch each base.

Central Washington lost the game, 4-2

Sportsmanship at its best.

If Elvis Covered AC/DC

Give it 30 seconds

The Power of Mike

Your Name's Power is Creativity

Your name's power is that it helps you be creative. Your name conveys both purity and skill. People who meet you can't help but think you are charming. You try to live your life with people you trust, surrounded by nature.

What's Your Name's Power?

Today's Winter Weather Winner Was

Me



(screenshot of my friend's and family's weather)

The windchill index is right around zero...and that's because the wind has calmed down some. (the temp was a little higher around six o'clock this a.m., but the wind was blowing around 45 mph) The Texas Dept. of Transportation has closed I-40 from Amarillo to New Mexico and also most major roads going north.

Travel is being discouraged. (duh)

feckless

feckless \FEK-lis\, adjective:
1. Ineffective; having no real worth or purpose.
2. Worthless; irresponsible; generally incompetent and ineffectual.

---

Wow, a word that describes both me AND this blog.

Foreigners Face Feedjit Facts

I've noticed on the Feedjit feed that this blog has been getting quite a number of non-USA hits on my spam posts. Here's the latest:



What's odd is that several come directly, not from Google or other searches.

I don't know what that means; it might mean someone else has sent the URL of a particular post to them or perhaps they're following the post via an RSS feed. Maybe they've visited before and are just seeing if someone has posted to it.

On the other hand, some might be the original spammers, coming back to see what the "bakapor" has done with the mail they sent me. They're all not from Russia or some other ex-Soviet bloc where much of this stuff originates, but some of them are.

They might be angry enough to post to a thread or send me an email. I'll need to brush up on my Russian curse words if that ever happens .

Paashol v'chorte! When you send me mails, you give me permission to post your email addy and the attached photos and text. Don't like it? Toughsky shitsky.

tumult

tumult \TOO-mult; TYOO-mult\, noun:
1. The commotion or agitation of a crowd, usually accompanied with great noise, uproar, and confusion of voices; hurly-burly; noisy confusion.
2. Violent commotion or agitation, with confusion of sounds; as, "the tumult of the elements."
3. Irregular or confused motion; agitation; high excitement; as, "the tumult of the spirits or passions."
--tumultuous, adjective

---

There'd probably be more of a tumult from first-time visitors to this blog if I didn't have some restrictions on posting.

Atteention!

Clever spammer alert!

First, misspell the subject line to fool the spam filters.

Then, instead of spelling out the product they're trying to sell, use a huge table with multiple colored cells.



Add some nonsensical text:

Also kritavarma of the satvata race, clad in mail as worshipping the deities at all the sacrifices. Quiete: in somno, a rather poetical usage. Narravit: breath had awakened all the memory of their love it would be just to grant them some compensation.

And the obligatory masked URL. No need to show you that, huh?

Ironic Birthdays

Listening to the radio just now, I learned it was the birthday of both Anita Bryant and Elton John.

I once read that if you polled at random any 25 people, odds are you'd find that two would share the same birthday. That's statistics I suppose, but Elton John and Anita Bryant sharing a birthday couldn't be anything but ironic.

I Didn't Know

"Slob" was a fashion

Labuat

Labuat

A website that delights one's sense of both sight and sound. Wait for the page to load, then use your cursor to trace along the page as it scrolls along with the lovely music. Many interesting images will appear as the song's tempo alternately slows and increases.



Labuat is Spanish musician artist Virginia Maestro's project. She is a singer and songwriter and also plays guitar, piano and harmonica.

Far Away Fortune

I hope it hurries up and gets here.

So Far Away - Staind

Even It Up

I've got this compulsion to keep both columns the same length, so one day a reader might find a post down on the bottom of the page, see it gone the next day (IF they return) and then find it back the day after that.

As the month goes by and the archive list in the right column gets longer, I usually have to keep changing the number of posts on the page to equalize the length. A long post will make the total number of posts smaller and more small posts makes it larger.

I don't think that particular obsession is particularly weird...I simply want to keep the page looking better...but what might be weird is that this tune goes through my head sometimes when I'm changing the blog.

Even It Up - Heart



Now I'll have to go change the number of posts again.

I've got to "even it up".

Senseless Voices

No, they don't.

Not when my TV is tuned to C-SPAN, CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC or PBS news.

So Alive - Love & Rockets

One Hour of Heavy Petting

Costs about five bucks.

No, not what you think; it's a cool article about a "cat cafe" in Osaka, Japan.

A Fortune Yarn

---

I can't sew very well, much less knit. I can only sew so-so and am not a neat knitter.

This fortune reminds me of something I saw on a bathroom wall. Someone had scribbled:

"My mother made me a homosexual."

Under that someone else had added:

"If I gave her the wool, would she make me one too?"

A Rich Quote

The road to happiness lies in two simple principles: find what it is that interests you and that you can do well, and when you find it, put your whole soul into it -- every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have.
- John D. Rockefeller III

---

Yeah, and it'd help to be born richer 'n two foot up a bull's ass, too.

Uncle Jay Explains (3-23)

Flirting Fortune

Oh yeah, a sexual harassment suit is anything but dull.

Aviary

No, not a place for birds but a great online image manipulation website consisting of several tools: Phoenix, a basic image editor, Peacock, a tool for building filters and creating effects, Toucan, an application for building palettes, and soon to come is Raven, a vector graphics tool. Like Photoshop, Aviary's files also supports layers.

All you need is a web browser and register with the site.



Aviary

Steel-Toed

You Are Cowboy Boots

You are incredibly down to earth and happy with yourself. You don't pretend to be someone else. You also tend to be very practical. You don't really have a lot of room for fluff in your life. You are a very honest and direct person. You will give anyone a straight answer, even if it's a bit uncomfortable. While you're quite sensible, you always like a little bit of flash in your life. You don't overdo it, but you do like turning heads.

What Kind of Boots Are You?

---

I've owned one pair of cowboys boots in my life and they were steel-toed. I ordered them through a company I worked for at the time and for some reason, they were a size too small. I couldn't send them back, so I wore them...for a very short while.

To this day my toes ache when I see a pair of cowboys boots. Since I live in the Texas Panhandle, my tootsies ache pretty much all the time.

There were several versions of this song on YouTube, but I like this one because it's got nice, shapely legs in the boots. On the other hand, it's a little disconcerting to think those same legs are grandma...or even great-grandma...legs these days. Oh well, I'm gettin' to the age where varicose veins and wrinkles are starting to be sexy to me.

These Boots Are Made For Walking - Nancy Sinatra

pithy

pithy \PITH-ee\, adjective:
concise and to the point; full of meaning and force

---

Yet again, another word that doesn't describe this blog or the contents.

That is, unless you have a lisp.

Don't Svet Your Destiny

Good afternoon or evening, depending on that time of day when you receive this letter.

I looked your questionnaire and to tell the truth you have very much drawn my attention. I shall be glad, if we shall get acquainted to you. to me, I the single girl who wants to find the prince.

My name Svetlana. To me of 28 years, and I am still single in this big world. If you as single the man, and to you from 30 till 55 years I shall be glad to contact you. Probably it is our destiny?

If you were interested with my offer on acquaintance I shall wait your answer, on my personal E-mail: svetulka80@yahoo.de

I hope, that you will not ignore me. I shall wait your answer.

Yours faithfully
Svetlana.



Dear Svetlana,

You're trying to tell me you can't find a man in all of Russia? I guess I can sympathize because I've been told I can't find a woman in this hemisphere.

So, you can't find a prince, eh? Ever try kissing frogs? It might be your destiny to find a prince or it might be your destiny to get warts, who knows?

Always,
Mike

P.S. Next time you write, put in some funnier stuff so I can have an easier time making fun of it. (Your fractured English just isn't enough) Rest assured, however, that I will never ignore them.

Just to let you know, I post these mails so I can let the spambots pick up on your email addy as well as the one the email really came from.

dakimushkin@list.ru