 |  |  |
 |
January 14, 2009
Alternative Uses for Vodka
From the email archives:
1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The solvent dissolves the adhesive.
2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew.
3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs.
4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.
5. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush, then blot dry.
6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores.
7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.
8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray bees or wasps to kill them.
9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziplock freezer bag, and freeze for a slushy, refreshable ice pack for aches, pain, or black eyes.
10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers, fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for three days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter then apply the tincture to aches and pains.
11. Make your own mouthwash by mixing nine tablespoons powered cinnamon with one cup vodka. Seal in an airtight container for two weeks. Strain through a coffee filter then mix with warm water and rinse your mouth. DonÂ’t swallow.
12. Using a q-tip, apply vodka to a cold sore to help it dry out.
13. If a blister opens, pour vodka over the raw skin as a local anesthetic that also disinfects the exposed dermis.
14. To treat dandruff, mix one cup vodka with two teaspoons crushed rosemary, let sit for two days, strain through a coffee filter and massage into your scalp and let dry.
15. To treat an earache put a few drops of vodka in your ear. Let set for a few minutes. Then drain. The vodka will kill the bacteria that are causing pain in your ear.
16. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment.
17. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.
18. Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.
19. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the poison oil from your skin.
20. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.
21. If all else fails, just turn the bottle up and drink it, nothing will matter anymore anyway
January 13, 2009
January 12, 2009
It's Girl Scout Cookie Time!
From the GS website (with a hat tip to Don't Mess With Taxes)
Q: Is the purchase of Girl Scout Cookies tax-deductible?
A: No and Yes.
* No, if the customer keeps the cookies. Individuals who buy Girl Scout Cookies and take the cookies home, or consume them, have purchased a product at a fair market value. For this reason, no part of the price of a box of Girl Scout Cookies used in this way is tax-deductible.
* Yes, if the customer leaves the cookies with Girl Scouts. Many Girl Scouts ask customers to pay for one or more boxes of cookies for use in their community service project, for example, collecting for a food pantry. The customers not receiving any Girl Scout Cookies do not benefit directly from paying for them. Those individuals may treat the purchase price of the donated cookies as a charitable contribution.
So, for example, if you wanted to buy some Girl Scout cookies for members of our armed forces overseas, you could claim those cookies as a charitable donation.
Lemme tell ya something; I got a Thin Mint addiction, like big-time, man. I'm jonesin' right now just thinkin' 'bout 'em. I need a Thin Mint fix.
I bought several boxes last year, intending to share them with my family as well as with some online friends in other countries.
They didn't make it...and I almost didn't either, what with the one long, continuous sugar coma I was in.
Thin Mints aren't my favorite cookie; that would have to be a fresh-baked chocolate chip. I could probably live with only having but a store-bought Oreo® for the rest of my life, but Thin Mints are RARE.
Once a year and only once they come in the lovely green GS boxes with pictures of cute smiling Girl Scouts on them, delivered by cute and smiling Girl Scouts, but what's best is when you open the box: Two foil covered sleeves of Thin Mints.
I always try to eat no more than half a sleeve at a time, I really do. My problem is I only allot five minutes in between the portions.
They're not really a dipping cookie as the chocolate covering is too hard to let milk soak through, but hot liquids, such as tea or coffee will melt the shell a bit and penetrate the cookie. It takes several cookies, thank goodness, to finally gauge just how long to let them soak. Too long and the cookie will break off right at the "waterline" and settle down to the bottom of the cup.
That's OK, though, because the cookie is so delicious, it flavors the coffee/tea and after drinking the liquid, there's a lovely gooey mass to consume at the end.
I've learned to be careful because a few years ago I was trying to coax the sodden cookie crumbs into my mouth, tapping on the side of the cup with my free hand - because it's easy to knock out a tooth if you use your lips to bang the cup against - when all of a sudden I had an mini-avalanche of Thin Mint dregs in my mouth and half-way down my throat.
Surprised, I did the reflexive thing and gasped...way wrong thing to do. It didn't take long for me to cough out the obstruction, but it seemed like an hour or two while I tried to get a breath and all the while I was thinking of the headlines and if it would hurt GS cookie sales.
Good Eggs
Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold but so does a hard boiled egg.
- Anonymous
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
