Welcome to ToTG!

March 31, 2013

Largest Easter Egg Hunt

The largest Easter Egg hunt on record took place in 2007 at the Cypress Gardens theme park in Winter Haven, Florida. It took the 9,700 participants just one hour to find the 510,000 candy eggs.

Source:  Guinness World Records

Wisdom of the Easter Bunny

All I need to know about life I learned from the Easter Bunny

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Walk softly and carry a big carrot.

Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.

There's no such thing as too much candy.

All work and no play can make you a basket case.

A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.

Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.

Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.

Some body parts should be floppy.

Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.

Good things come in small-sugarcoated packages.

The grass is always greener in someone else's basket.

An Easter bonnet can tame even the wildest hare.

To show your true colors you have to come out of the shell.

The best things in life are still sweet and gooey.

March 29, 2013

"Father, Forgive Them"

Originally posted 4/10/09.  A "bump" for Good Friday. Other Groom Cross posts (and mentions)

Jesus on cross-Cross of Our Lord, Groom Texas

FotoSketch of Jesus on the cross, Cross of Our Lord Groom Texas

Sincerely Another Quiz

Pretty close, except for the "conscientious and responsible" part.  And the "procrastinating or shirking", too. Oh, and the "puts manners first" is way off as well.  I DO try to make sure my emails are well-composed, though.  They're often always too wordy, but.... Thank goodness for spell check.

One of the questions was "When was the last time you hand-wrote a letter?"  I'm glad "I can't remember" was one of the choices, because I honestly can't remember.  It's probably been over fifteen years ago, before I got a computer, for sure.  It's hard for me to sign my name on a credit card slip; I've almost forgotten how to write.

I'm really not a "sincerely" type of person.  If it's a friend or family member, I usually sign off with "Love";  if it's a stranger, it's "Regards".  Most of the time I don't put anything other than my name.

You Are Sincerely

You're the type of person who puts manners first. You always act appropriately.

You are conscientious and responsible.

You don't like the feeling of procrastinating or shirking.

While you don't always sign your emails 'Sincerely,' you make sure that they are well composed.

Whether you're emailing a friend or a business associate, you take the time to double check your words.

More than any other type, you make sure email doesn't pile up for you. You know it's important to reply quickly.

Some may say that email is going out of style, but you still consider it an art form. And you couldn't imagine living without it. 

Maybe the quiz says I use "Sincerely" because this song came out the year I was born.  Just like me, an oldie but a goody.

Rank & Worth

ToTG is ranked #8,129,387 in the world according to Website Value. Different sites give some vastly different rankings, especially in what ToTG is "worth". ValueMyWeb says it's worth $499. I've said this before, but I'd sell it for that in a New York minute except I was taught to never cheat anyone.

webArbiter says it's worth $457. Yeah, right.

Alexa, arguably the most accurate of these types of statistics sites, globally ranks ToTG #23,066,013.

SiteWorthGet said this blog was worth $139, but after updating the information, its worth is now $109. I shouldn't have updated it, it depreciated 21 bucks with one mouse click! (the content has greatly depreciated over the years since I started it, too)

OTOH, siteworthchecker had a value of Zero, Zilch, Nada...the big ol' goose egg $0 but after an update, it is also now valued at $109. To be honest, that still seems way too a little high.

I guess "worth" means the potential for earning, but since there's no ads, that's a moot point. The numbers vary from site-to-site, but most of the estimated earnings come in at around ten bucks/month. It's worth $10 to me to NOT subject my few readers to ads and the potential for trojans/viruses many hosted ads contain not to mention the invasion of privacy and all-around annoyance of them.  I use various ad block extensions on my Firefox browser and I expect many others do as well.  If not, they should. 

urlpulse says it's ranked #28,916,047 in the world, #2,318,571 in the United States and worth $855.30, with a value per visitor of .03 cents.

Maybe that's why this blog doesn't get many visitors or many people leaving their two cents worth. I'd hate to post here too and have my worth devalued by 2/3.

March 27, 2013

I'm a Fun Guy!

Did you know mushrooms are more closely related to animals than to plants?

Mushrooms are fungi, which are actually genetically closer to animals than they are to plants. Scientists use a genealogical path known as the Tree of Life to trace the evolution of living organisms, and they have determined that fungi share a common ancestor with animals and are completely branched off from plants.

Fungi and animals have to turn to external sources for their food sources, but plants can produce their own nutrients. Chitin, a complex carbohydrate responsible for cell wall structure, is a molecule that is shared by fungi and animals but is not found in plants.

wiseGEEK: Learn Something New Every Day

March 25, 2013

Good News, Bad News

The bad news is it's taking its own sweet time getting here.

March 24, 2013

Tongue Out-of-Cheek

Did you know the Okapi is the only mammal capable of cleaning its ears and eyelids with its tongue? Their tongue can be up to a foot long.

Okapi at the Okapi Wildlife Reserve, Congo

Although Gene Simmons comes close.

March 23, 2013

I Rattle and Roll Them, Too

You Are a Rule Shaker

You generally follow the rules, but every now and then you like to shake things up a bit.

You are both a rule maker and a rule breaker. You appreciate rules, but you also think they should be questioned.

You think rules generally promote social order, and you're in favor of them - in principle.

You also know, though, that rules can become outdated or irrelevant. You are willing to break a rule if you think there is cause to.

You maintain flexibility with the rules you set up for yourself and others in your life. You aren't too strict about anything.

In your opinion, there is always a middle ground. It's often best just to use your judgment instead of following a particular rule.

Both Sides Now - Joni Mitchell

I saw an article about origami the other day and it reminded me of an old friend from MSN Groups, Brad (in Kentucky).  I've been thinking of him a lot here lately and remembered he once said Joni Mitchell was his favorite musical artist.   So, here's thinking of you, Binky.  R.I.P.

March 20, 2013



primaveral pri·ma·ve·ral [prahy-muh-veer-uhl] adjective
of, in, or pertaining to the early springtime

I have some primaveral longings for springtime, mostly so my heating bill will go down.

What Took You So Little?

I was checking out the StatCounter statistics; since this blog isn't monetized, it really doesn't matter about the number of visitors, but I have the counter mostly to satisfy my own curiosity as to just who - and to a lesser extent, how many - people visit. It's also interesting to see where they come from and what they're searching for.  I also like to see what browser and operating system they're using.  It doesn't keep a running total like the StatCounter does, but my Feedjit counter does a good job in "real time" letting me know who is visiting, what they were looking for and what country they're from.

I've only had the counter for a couple of months and learned something after going by the Google Analytics page statistics; I used to think this blog had about a hundred visitors every day, but that was "page loads" and not unique visitors.  That figure is usually from 30-40. Oh well. (the counter doesn't give detailed stats on the https traffic;  for that, I'd have to pay for it and I certainly don't want to do that!)

One statistic I hadn't checked before was the length of stay and I was a little dismayed to see how little time most people spent here. Here's a screen capture of that particular stat:

As you can see, nearly 80% spend less than five seconds after they get here. One thing I'll give 'em...they recognize a worthless blog when they see one.

The 9 that stayed longer than an hour must have fallen asleep at their computer.

March 18, 2013



qualm [kwahm, kwawm] noun

1. an uneasy feeling or pang of conscience as to conduct; compunction: He has no qualms about lying.
2. a sudden feeling of apprehensive uneasiness; misgiving: a sudden qualm about the success of the venture.
3. a sudden sensation or onset of faintness or illness, especially of nausea.

I don't have any qualms about subjecting my readers to my usual crappy posts. OTOH, they probably have a qualm when they read my crappy posts.

Enter Sandman - Metallica

Live at Nimes

How a Key Lock Works

How a standard key lock actually works:

From the site: I have always wanted to know how exactly a key engages with the lock, but of course I never bothered to do any research. This is how.

How a standard key lock works

EDIT: I hope this doesn't break any copyright laws; I used the share feature in my reader and that's a hotlinked graphic from Today I Learned. If the webmaster sees it in his web logs and complains, I'll take it down. I'm off to ask permission!

EDIT (again): Just got a reply from the owner of the site saying it was fine, but to please put in a link.  I had linked to the article at the top of the post, but will put it in again.

How a standard key lock actually works

From Today I Learned Something New

March 17, 2013

The Bookshelf Test

Your Bookshelf is Comforting

You collect books because you love to read. You love stories, and you reread your favorites over and over again.

It's hard for you to pass up a book by your favorite author. Once you find a writer you love, you tend to read his or her whole catalog.

Your favorite books are full of engaging stories, relatable characters, and surprising plot twists. You like to be immersed in a story.

You read when you want to relax a bit or get away from the dreariness of life. Nothing renews you like a book.

You love books for what's in them, and you don't get too caught up in the appearances of your collection. 

In fact, some of your favorite books are well worn, sentimental favorites. That's worth more to you than the latest shiny hardback. 

The Cup Song

March 14, 2013

There Are No Stupid Questions

I've heard that all my life, but earlier today on Facebook, I saw these questions posed by someone who was trying to be clever.  I decided I'd answer them.

If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?

Yes, Wikipedia has an entry: Marsquake. Don't trust Wiki? Check out this article on the respected Space.com: Marsquakes: Red Planet May Still Rumble. It was even in the news a few months back: NASA wants to measure 'Marsquakes'

When lightening strikes the ocean, why don’t all the fish die?

First, it's spelled "lightning" and if fish were in the immediate vicinity of a lightning strike, they'd probably die, but fortunately for marine life, the electrical current spreads out and dissipates until it becomes too weak to do any harm.

How far away from the immediate strike do fish still die?  Ewen Thomson, an electrical engineer at the University of Florida says the "lethal distance,"  depends on (1) how much current there is in a lightning bolt and (2) how much current it takes to electrocute a fish. Ichthyologists (fish biologists) sometimes catch fish to study by zapping them with electricity. The best estimates are that lightning bolts probably don't kill fish more than 200 feet away in salt water, even less distance in fresh water. (because salt water conducts electricity better)

If there’s a speed of light and a speed of sound, is there a speed of smell?

The speed of an odor from source to the time your brain registers it depends upon the air currents and your own neural impulses.  So, there's no set speed of smell.

Can you cry underwater?

Of course you can.  The tears will rapidly dissolve into the surrounding water, but tears can be leaving the tear duct.  If you're wearing a mask, then it's feasible that you could cry enough to fill it up.  Doubtful, but feasible.  If you are in that much pain or having that much grief underwater, it's probably best to get to the surface ASAP...unless you're TRYING to drown yourself, then....

Does the postman deliver his own mail?

If his house is on his route he would.  Why wouldn't he? (or she - the proper term now is "letter carrier")  I was friends with my regular letter carrier and he told me routes are often rotated amongst all of them, with the more senior carriers getting their choice of the best routes. 

That said, I went to both the official USPS website as well as the one for the letter carrier's union and couldn't find anything.  I did see a phone number, so I dialed it and after FINALLY being transferred to a human, I asked the question.  She was taken aback and then looked through all of her "pat answers" and found nothing, but agreed with me there didn't seem to be any rules or regulations against it.  We both didn't think a carrier would be dispatched ONLY to deliver another carrier's mail.

Why is there a light in the refrigerator and not in the freezer?

The newer "side by side" fridges do have lights in both compartments.  Back in the days before the advent of LED lights and frost-free freezers, putting a light into the freezer compartment was an engineering challenge. An incandescent light globe in the freezer will generate heat while the door is open, and will be covered in frost soon after the door is closed.  The sudden temperature change and moisture could cause the bulb to shatter when the door is opened again.  In my search for the answer, I found several sites that sell add-on lights for freezers without lights.

Can crop circles be square?

If something is square, it can't be a circle, but there ARE squares that have been found inside the "mysterious" crop circles.   Google "crop circles with squares" images and you'll see them with not only squares, but triangles and other non-circle geometric shapes inside them.

Are eyebrows considered facial hair?

Eyebrows are on your face, therefore by definition they ARE facial hair. 

Is there ever a day mattresses aren’t on sale?

Well, the seemingly continuous sales aside, the answer has to be "Yes", simply due to the fact that most mattress stores aren't open every day.  Most are closed on Sundays and nearly all are closed on major holidays.  They can't have a sale if they're not open. Every store I've ever been to has sales on merchandise, even item specific businesses;   for example, tire stores have sales on the products that aren't selling well or tires they've got a deal on for buying in bulk and can offer them at a discount to their customers.  The same is true for places that sell stationery, liquor stores, clothing shops, etc.  

From my own short time spent working in a furniture store, I learned that mattresses have a huge mark-up in price and a "sale" might only mean the product is "marked down" to the store's regular profit margin.  Just a trick of the trade, used in many other businesses.  Other than that sneaky tactic, it's hard to begrudge them a good profit because a mattress store can have quite a bit of money tied up in inventory, what with different brands, styles, sizes, etc.  Also, if a customer buys a mattress, they probably won't be back for a replacement for at least four/five years or longer.

How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons but lemon juice has artificial flavorings?

The stupidest question of a stupid bunch.  How can a real lemon have artificial flavorings?

What's really stupid was me spending any amount of time finding the answers to these stupid questions.

March 13, 2013

When You Really Loved Someone-Agnetha Fältskog

Capital Trivia

Did you know the least populous state capital in the U.S. is Montpelier, Vermont? Its population, according to the 2010 Census, is 7,855.

Did you know the most populous state capital is Phoenix, Arizona, with a population of 1,445,632?

List of capitals in the United States

Roundabout - Yes

RIP Peter Banks

There were other better known Yes tunes I could have chosen, but this is the one that first comes to my mind when I think of the group. My roommate in college used to play the opening riff on his guitar and we'd listen to their album all night long, leaving it on the turntable where it would play over and over and over.

March 12, 2013

Psychic NASCAR

The other day I saw a quote attributed to Edgar Cayce on our Quote of the Day module in the right-hand column and while the name rang a bell, I wasn't for sure just exactly who he was. After a quick bit of research, I was reminded he was famous for being a psychic. I then went to the source of the quote and saw this:

What I'd like to know is what does Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton have to do with Cayce? For that matter why is Ric Flair, a pro wrestler or Fred Rogers - Mr. Rogers - included in the list? Why are racing legends Dale Earnhardt and Mario Andretti on there, too? That's more of a mystery than Edgar Cayce's alleged psychic abilities.

I wanted to put a really clever headline on this post and I did some looking around the 'net for words that rhymed with "psychic" but there aren't that many. Too bad there wasn't a soccer player on the list or I could have used "Kick Psychic" or some variation. Oh well. I did find some pyschic jokes; here are a couple of the best ones.

Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. -- Steven Wright

Two psychic healers meet in the street - "You're fine - how am I?"

Under the Google search for psychic jokes was this: 9 Psychic Jokes I'm Sick Of where a psychic explains why she doesn't find certain jokes about psychics funny at all. (Personally, I thought some of them hilarious) At first, my eyes were drawn to her phone rate for psychic reading - $4.99/minute -(which I found offensive) then I saw something she had written about herself that was much funnier than the jokes she found offensive.

Ever since I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, I haven't needed a crystal ball. I could see visions in a toothbrush!

Wow.  Schizophrenia + psychic ability + a toothbrush.  There's gotta be a joke there somewhere.  One will probably come to me later in a vision.

March 11, 2013

I'm Glad I'm Not High

Maintenance, that is.

I'm so low maintenance, I don't even come with an operator's manual.

You Are Low Maintenance

Compared to most people, you are incredibly easy going.

To be honest, you are truly a breath of fresh air.

You are open minded about trying new things, and you're not upset when things don't work out.

You are willing to go along to get along. 

And your attitude helps you truly enjoy life! 

The Vanishing Train

From New Scientist

It's a model train like no other: when it enters a tunnel, it seems to defy the properties of space and time. But of course, what you're seeing is just an illusion. Do you know what the trick involves?

Courtesy of neuroscientist Al Seckel, the video is free of editing effects or computer-generated imagery. "There is one train; it is as long as you see," he says. The illusion, presented in his newly published digital book that delves into the science of the world's best illusions, continues to fool Nobel laureates and other great minds when presented at conferences.

If you think you know what's happening in the video, let us know in the comments section below. The first person to post a correct answer will win a New Scientist goodie bag

March 10, 2013

Rattlesnake Roundup

One of the first arguments I ever got into on the 'net was in a TalkCity chat room where someone asked me if I lived near Sweetwater, Texas (where the rattlesnake roundup takes place.) I said I didn't live near there, but when the person asked what I thought of it, I replied that I couldn't see much wrong with it. I was then called a savage, a planet destroyer, a hater of Mother Gaia, etc.

I've done quite a bit of research on this hunt and others and rattlesnakes in general, especially after being attacked in my Rattlesnakes in Palo Duro Canyon post. (that's the reason I hid the comments and don't allow any others on that particular one) From what I've read, the hunt DOES have a short-term affect on the rattler population, but that the snakes adapt quickly to the fluctuations in food.  Reduce the rattler population, the numbers of rats, mice and rabbits go up, creating a larger food supply for the snakes, then their numbers increase in response. I've never seen anything that said rattlesnakes are anywhere close to being an endangered species.* 

Yes, it would be "best" for animals if we (humans) didn't encroach upon their territory, but we always have and always will.  As far as the charges of animal cruelty...well, that doesn't generate much sympathy in me.  The snakes are handled roughly, but the way they're dispatched doesn't see overly cruel to me. 

I've killed a few rattlers in my life, always when out hunting rabbits.  I've never gone out of my way to kill them;  I don't go hunting them, don't run over them in my vehicle.  I figure if they leave me alone, I'll leave them alone.   That said, if I found one in my yard then their life expectancy would be the exact amt. of time it would take me to find a hoe or shovel.

*After this post hit my reader and I re-read it, I thought I'd better add there is no danger, not at the present time, that Western Diamondback rattlers are endangered.  I have read the Eastern type is being considered for the endangered list.

I also want to add that I'm not endorsing the roundup but I'm also not going to condemn it.  I'll admit that I'm not a fan of snakes or most reptiles, so the fact that they're not "cute and cuddly" factors into my ambivalence.  If taking out so many rattlers reduces the population, one would think the number of snakes caught each year would go down.

March 9, 2013

Ten Principles of a Free Society

1. Rights belong to individuals, not groups; they derive from our nature and can neither be granted nor taken away by government.

2. All peaceful, voluntary economic and social associations are permitted; consent is the basis of the social and economic order.

3. Justly acquired property is privately owned by individuals and voluntary groups, and this ownership cannot be arbitrarily voided by governments.

4. Government may not redistribute private wealth or grant special privileges to any individual or group.

5. Individuals are responsible for their own actions; government cannot and should not protect us from ourselves.

6. Government may not claim the monopoly over a people's money and government must never engage in official counterfeiting, even in the name of macroeconomic stability.

7. Aggressive wars, even when called preventative, and even when they pertain only to trade relations, are forbidden.

8. Jury nullification, that is, the right of jurors to judge the law as well as the facts, is a right of the people and the courtroom norm.

9. All forms of involuntary servitude are prohibited, not only slavery but also conscription, forced association, and forced welfare distribution.

10. Government must obey the law that it expects other people to obey and thereby must never use force to mold behavior, manipulate social outcomes, manage the economy, or tell other countries how to behave.

 Liberty Defined: 50 Essential Issues That Affect Our Freedom by Ron Paul

March 8, 2013

50 Beautiful Women

50 of the Most Beautiful Women - Morphing

Cats Can Be Jerks

Laid Back As They Come

All innuendo aside, I'd say that's fairly true.

You Have A Type B Personality

You're as laid back as they come...

Your baseline mood is calm and level headed

Creativity and philosophy are your forte

Like a natural sedative, you have a soothing effect on people

Friends and family often turn to you first with their problems

You have the personality to be a spiritual or psychological guru


Two versions.  Personally, I prefer the original, but the remake is a pretty good job.

Shocking Blue


From A to Pee

How much liquid does the human bladder hold?

If you were to ask most women, the answer would probably be "Not enough!" Seriously, the bladder in humans and other mammals is an extremely elastic and expandable muscular sac. The average adult can comfortably hold up to about one-third quart of urine. More urine causes the bladder to become distended and uncomfortable. Each individual is different, of course, so there are wide variations in urine capacity.

It had been a while since I had done trivia and I couldn't remember if I had already posted this one, so I did a quick search. I hadn't, but was surprised that there were quite a few more pee posts.

I'm not really fond of bodily function humor, but one of the earliest jokes I ever remember was my momma saying "Just call me Peepee...I'm all urine." That was funny when I was about ten or so. I guess it still is. It's much funnier than the other similar joke I heard around the same time; counting off: "You're a five, You're a six, you're a seven, you're..."

That's about all the jokes I know about peeing, although when it was raining heavily my dad would say "It's coming down like a cow peein' on a flat rock."  It also reminds me of talking about the differences between men and women with an old girlfriend and she said women can do anything a man can do PLUS have babies.  I told her they couldn't write their names in the snow. 

The next time it snowed I reminded her about her boast and in just a few minutes, she proved me wrong.  Her "writing" wasn't as neat as mine, but to give her credit, it was legible.   It was also hilarious to see.

Oh, there's one more peeing joke I had forgotten.  It's been around as long as I can remember.  The first time I heard it, it had Richard Nixon in it, so that should tell you how old it is.  I'll update it to be current.

One snowy Washington DC morning, President Obama woke up and saw "Obama sucks!" written in the snow on the White House lawn.  He was so enraged, he got the FBI on the case, taking evidence to find out who was the culprit.  A few hours later, they came back to him with the report.

"We hate to have to tell you this...." said the FBI agent.  "Tell me!" commanded the President. "Well, we ran tests and it turns out it's Joe Biden's DNA."  Furious, the President glared at him.  "We have even more bad news, Mr. President." the FBI agent continued.  "What could be worse than having my Vice-President mock me?" asked the President.  "Well..." stammered the FBI man.  "It was in Michelle's handwriting."

OK, enough horrible jokes.  I'm sure they're pushing the G-rated classification of this blog as it is.    I'll just close with this admission:

I suffer from Paruresis.

March 6, 2013

El Degüello

El Degüello is the "No Quarter" song played by Santa Ana's troops during the start of the siege of the Alamo

El Degüello means "slit throat".

Ballad of the Alamo - Marty Robbins

Green Leaves of Summer

The Alamo fell on this day in 1836.

March 5, 2013

The Last Picture Show

One of my favorite movies. The movie takes place around the time I was born, but I can identify with the characters growing up in a small Texas town.

I haven't been to the movies in years, not since Titanic. (the movie, not the actual voyage) I love movies,though, and have a fairly large collection of DVDs, mostly being my favorite movies which I gleaned from the Wal Mart bargain bin. The majority of them are still in the wrappers, unopened and I'm saving them for a rainy day. Or when I don't have Internet. Or forget to pay the cable bill.

When I was a kid, my two older sisters and I used to go to the movies fairly often, nearly every Saturday. Our folks would drop us off there on a Saturday afternoon and go do Lord only knows what, but they'd be gone a long time and we'd not only watch the movie once, but sometimes sit through it a second time waiting on our parents. Even then, concession prices were outrageous so we'd smuggle candy in and use whatever money was left over from buying tickets to get soft drinks. We'd usually have a big carton of Whoppers malted milk balls, my oldest sister's favorite candy. My other sister still says my big sis would dole them out: "One for you, one for you and two for me....one for you, one for you, two for me." I don't remember it quite that way and I'm sure my sis gave me more than my share to keep me from fidgeting and whining. At that time, there were two theaters here in town, the La Vista Theater (recent photo) and the Capri Theatre.

The La Vista was an older movie house, but some seats were reclining and they also had a "crying room", a small soundproof room with a huge picture window so mothers could take cranky infants inside and not disturb the other patrons. I used to like to go in there sometimes just for the novelty of it. Some of their seats however were threadbare and crooked, the padding compressed by thousands of movie goer's butts over the decades. I can't remember when it closed, but the last time I was in there it was very run-down and dirty, the floor permanently sticky from thousands of gallons of spilled drinks, the once-beautiful art deco marquis in front showing its age.

The other theater, the Capri, was new, but lacked the style of the LaVista. The seats didn't recline, but at least they had padding. It's closed now as well, a victim of both a new multi-screen theater in the shopping center and the advent of home VCRs. I remember my folks speaking of La Nora Theatre with fondness, but that was before my time. According to what I read on the 'net, it burned down in 1960.

I don't recall my parents ever going to the theater with us, but I do remember all of us going to the drive-in. At one time there were two of them here in town, both long since gone. One of them had a playground right under the huge screen and I guess I was about six or seven and looking up and seeing the shower scene from Psycho, the knife ripping through the curtain, as large as a car from that perspective. I opted for baths for years after that.

Funny how things embarrass you when you're a kid. I absently mindedly scratched my butt once in the hallway at school and one of the other guys said "Hey, Mike....you goin' to the movies?" Puzzled, I shook my head. "Jes' wonderin'." he snickered. "You were pickin' yer seat." My face turned red with the howls of every kid in earshot. He didn't think it so funny when I poured vinegar into his chocolate milk later at lunch. I'm not sure what was more funny; the look on his face when he swallowed or watching it come out his nose. The lesson I learned best that day wasn't in reading or writing, but "don't get mad, get even."

I haven't been to a drive-in since I lived in Denton. A buddy and our girlfriends would load up and go, especially on the nights when it was "bumper sticker night"; if you had the bumper sticker on your vehicle of the radio station that sponsored the night, the entire carload got in for just a few dollars. The movies usually weren't all that good, but it was fun to get there early and watch the college kids drive in and unload eight or ten out of the car and sometimes several more out of the trunk. We usually went in my friend's El Camino, parking backwards in the space and sitting in lawn chairs in the back, drinking beer and enjoying the soft, warm North Texas nights more than we did the movie.

Thinking of how much fun it was to go to the movies when I was younger reminded me of a girl I went to school with. She was a couple of years younger than me, really cute, but...well, let's just say she wasn't the brightest bulb on the tree, ok? A classmate of mine took her to the movies one Saturday evening and told us about the date on the following Monday. She lived way out in the country, so he left early to pick her up as so to be able to get to the first showing of the movie he planned to take her to. She wasn't ready - I really don't think she was too good at telling time - and they got to the theater after the movie started.

They sat through the movie and the intermission after it was over. This was back when they didn't clear the theater after the showing (and that was why my sisters and I sat through two showings of a movie when we were kids) and there were local commercials, cartoons and coming attractions before the feature started. My friend and his date watched all of that, then watched the first of the movie that they had missed.

My classmate said several minutes of what they had seen had gone by and he was ready to go. He kept glancing over at the girl, but she was engrossed in the movie as if she had never seen it before. He waited a few more minutes, trying to be polite, thinking that she'd finally catch on that she had already seen that part of the movie, then leaned over to her and whispered:

"Where did we come in at?"

She looked at him like HE was the stupid one and with a mouth full of popcorn turned around and pointed:

"Right back there at that door!"

The Incredible Shrinking Building

March 4, 2013


That's what someone needs to say to me sometimes, esp. in regards to this blog. I've been trying to keep "fresh" content as so to keep my thousands hundreds dozens of three regular readers entertained, but have been slacking off here lately.  I've got a bunch of stuff to post, especially trivia, but I just can't work up the motivation.  I could post a quiz, but I don't like to do too many of those, or a video, but I don't like putting more than a couple on one "page".   I probably should get out and take some photos, but I think I've photographed everything in a hundred mile radius - twice.

For the first time in months, I even forgot to play the quiz.   Good grief.  I even forgot to visit several of my favorite websites I try to hit every day.

I've also been having more U-Verse problems.   It's really frustrating trying to watch a movie or documentary on Hulu or YouTube and have it stop in the middle, then not being able to pick it up where the connection went offline. I've been checking into other options, but none really sound any better or close to the same cost. 

So, if I don't post, it doesn't mean I'm dead (I hope)...it's just that I'm either experiencing extreme ennui or my connection is playing up.

March 2, 2013

3 Second Rule - Lisa Gail Allred

A friend made a comment about pop music in another post and while doing some research on what was said, I ran across this video in a site where the author of the article said he detested country pop. I like to think I'm fairly in-the-know on most Internet memes and new phenomena, but I wasn't familiar with this video or the singer/songwriter.

Watch this please, then tell me what you think in the comments. Thanks!

March 1, 2013

Not For Sure

What these two similar clip-arts are.

They're either models at a Dodge truck show...

Or Princess Leia and her momma.

(lecturing her about why it's not a good idea to have an affair with her own brother)

Making Money Is a Snap!

Anyone who knows me or has followed this blog for any length of time knows I am a Dallas Cowboy fan. (there's a Cowboys news module in the right-hand side column) I don't post much about them because frankly, it's been hard to be a fan for the last decade or so and I don't want or need trolls coming in and blasting my favorite team. I know they've sucked for a long time, I don't need to be reminded of it.

That said, I'm still a fan, although not as much of one as I once was. As I've grown older, I've become less and less interested in football...and all sports, for that matter. I try to watch the Cowboys on TV, but if they're playing badly I have no problem changing the channel. I've done that a lot over the last 15 years. I'm no fair-weather fan, but I'm also not a glutton for punishment.

I still keep up with them, however, reading articles about them on the Dallas Cowboys website and subscribe to a few fan sites in my reader. I was glad to see this article yesterday: Cowboys Sign Long Snapper LaDouceur To Five-Year Deal. I couldn't find the exact terms of the contract, at least none that sounded correct. Most sources said it was a five-year deal for $4 million, but LaDouceur has been in the league long enough to get at least the veteran minimum wage and the math doesn't work for that number.

Doing some quick research, I found that he made $790,000 for the 2012 season. Considering that all he does is "long snap", I decided to research a little more to see how much he made per actual play he was on the field. I figure he played during 31 field goal attempts, 68 punts and 38 PAT (subtracting three 2 point tries) for a total of 137 plays....without making a bad snap. That works out to $5,766.42/play. Not bad wages, huh?

That made me wonder about other player's wages per play. I thought about figuring what certain of my favorite players made, but the task would have been daunting, trying to find out the exact number of times they were on the field, taking off their substitutions, injuries, etc. It was fairly easy to calculate the number for the team's highest profile player and quarterback, Tony Romo.

(and I don't care what other people think of him, he's a favorite of mine and a good player. I don't care if anyone disagrees with me on his worth to the team; you can point out his mistakes, but I'll point out your lack of football knowledge.)

According to the Cowboy website's statistics, Dallas ran 1,049 offensive plays in 2012. The site says the backup QB Orton attempted 10 passes, but there's no breakdown of how many times he handed off the ball. So, let's just say for the matter of simplicity that Tony Romo was on the field for 925 plays, taking off the extra point kicks, adding back the 2 point tries, taking away the punt plays and estimating however many times Orton handed off. 925 is close enough for me.

Romo's listed salary for 2012 was $9,000,000. Now, I'm not sure, what with the signing bonus and the "funny money" salary cap implications, if it was more or less than that amount, but again, for the sake of simplicity, let's go with the figure of nine million. That means he got paid $9729.73 per play.

(for all you anal-retentive stat freaks: if you have a problem with my figures for that or any of the other calculations I've done, send me an email with detailed corrections, screen captures of your calculations and verified links to your sources to: idonotgiveadamn@buzzoff.net)

That's a pretty decent wage, wouldn't you say? Especially considering that a good percentage of those plays were just handing off the ball and not getting touched. Then again, there were far too many plays like this one:

That wasn't even close to the worst hit he took this last year, but I'm sure he would have given up part of his per-play salary to have avoided that hit. Hell, I would have given it ALL back, plus another couple of play's worth. LaDouceur might make only half of what Romo does per snap, but it's a wonder Romo's neck hasn't been snapped.

March Quiz Begins!

The previous monthly tournament for the ToTG Trivia Tournament has ended and a new one starts now!

Go to the quiz and play today!  Easy enough to do;  register, log in and begin.  There are ten questions, each with four multiple choices.  Hurry as fast as you can, though, because your score for the game not only depends upon correct answers, but your time as well.

The quizzes are set to the hardest categories possible, so don't be dismayed by not getting them all right.  Even with the regular "big brains" playing, a perfect score is rare.

Let's see what kind of brain you have!