ALTO!

From landelli.com.mx, a 404 page that literally stops you in your surfing tracks.

Although, I think stop signs in Mexico say "ALTO" and also in Central and S. America.  The website is in Spanish, but I guess only stupid gringos like me click on broken links, hence the English 404 page.

farrago

farrago \fuh-RAH-go; fuh-RAY-go\ , noun:
1. A confused mixture; an assortment; a medley.

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That'd make a good name for this blog.

gaucherie

gaucherie \goh-shuh-REE\ , noun:
1. A socially awkward or tactless act.
2. Lack of tact; boorishness; awkwardness.

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This blog...and me...are both a qaucherie.

At least I can rhyme, most of the time.

eldritch

eldritch \EL-drich\ , adjective:
1. Strange; unearthly; weird; eerie.

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Plenty of definitions in a Google search, but searching for images sure defines the word.

Passion Purpura

Passion purpura - the medical term for a hickey.

Ever played that "either/or" game when you were a kid?  "Would you rather be blind or crippled?" or things like that.   I remember this one:

"Which is worse?  Going to kiss your grandma and she slips you the tongue...or a hickey on a hemorrhoid?"

Dysania

Dysania - the state of finding it hard to get out of bed in the morning.

There's a simple remedy for that;  sleep past noon!

ultracrepidarian

ultracrepidarian

adjective [uhl-truh-kerp-i-dair-ee-uh-n]

1. noting or pertaining to a person who criticizes, judges, or gives advice outside the area of his or her expertise

2. an ultracrepidarian person

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I see a LOT of ultracrepidarians every day while online.

The Internet is full of 'em; childless people who know what's best for your child, people who comment about politics yet only listen to one side of an issue and just about every conspiratorial nutjob there is on the World Wide Web.

That's Weird

Weird doesn't follow the "i before e" rule.

That's pretty weird.

fanfaronade

fanfaronade noun [fan-fer-uh-neyd]

bragging; bravado; bluster

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Ah, the 3 "Bs" of Texas...or of Texans, actually.

I never had heard of this word before and I doubt that most of my fellow Texans have, either.  It's not something we'd use in everyday speech, mainly because we'd somehow make those four syllables stretch into at least eight and take a minute - or longer- to say the entire word.

Besides, it sounds like it's some sort of rodeo event or a variation of the Two-Step...or maybe some sissy cocktail that only city folks would drink.

plisky

plisky noun [plis-kee]

1. Scot. and North England. a mischievous trick; practical joke; prank.
2. Scot. and North England. mischievous; playful.

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I've seen a plethora of April Fools jokes today, but I won't try to pull a fast one over on any of my small but devoted number of loyal readers. After all, you're all far too clever to be taken in by something like that, right?

April Fools!

thaumaturgy

thaumaturgy \THAW-muh-tuhr-jee\, noun:
The performance of miracles or magic.

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Can't recall ever seeing this word in print and am postitive I've never heard it used...and doubt I ever will (hear it OR use it)

Then again....

It's certainly thaumaturgy that this blog has lasted this long, for sure.

Halloween Tang Toungler

Try saying this tongue tangler three times fast:

"Which witch wished which wicked witch?"

onychophagist

onychophagist Noun (plural onychophagists)

(rare) A person who bites his or her fingernails.

 Origin: From Ancient Greek ὀνυχο- (onuch), combining form of ὄνυξ (onux, “claw, nail”) + -φαγος (phagos, “eater”), from ἐφαγόν (ephagon, “I ate”).

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I never met a plumber with that problem.

Brobdingnagian

Brobdingnagian \brob-ding-NAG-ee-uhn\ , adjective;
1. Of extraordinary size; gigantic; enormous.

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This is one of those fifty-cent words used when a simpler word would suffice.

"Everything's Brobdingnagian in Texas." just doesn't have the right ring to it, y'know?

The Average Would Be Lower

But I bring the mean weight up:



Texas Is Not Obese!! Go Ahead, Eat That Cheese Enchilada!!

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I usually am not thrifty with my posts; after all, I don't pay for the electrons or the server space, but this one should include the word of the day:

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gormandize\GAWR-muhn-dahyz \ , verb;

1. To eat greedily or ravenously.

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That's one of those words we fat people like to use to describe our otherwise piggish eating habits.

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I "bumped" up this post because I'm now wondering if since legalizing pot, Colorado still has a low rate of obesity. Y'know, munchies and all that....

shenanigan

shenanigan\ shuh-NAN-i-guhn \ , noun;
1. Mischief; prankishness.
2. Remarks intended to deceive; deceit. Often used in the plural.

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"Often used in the plural".

Of course it is; what's the use of doin' a single shenanigan?

turpitude

turpitude noun [tur-pi-tood]

vile, shameful, or base character; depravity

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I knew of this word and have seen/heard it used most often in the phrase "moral turpitude". I haven't thought of it or heard it used in a long time, but from now on I'll think of it when I see a certain someone:

Looks like I'll think of it a LOT over the next four/five years. Gag.

Heaven help us all.

spoonerism

spoonerism \SPOO-nuh-riz-uhm\, noun:
The transposition of usually initial sounds in a pair of words.

Some examples: (from the website)

We all know what it is to have a half-warmed fish ["half-formed wish"] inside us.

A well-boiled icicle ["well-oiled bicycle"].

It is kisstomary to cuss ["customary to kiss"] the bride.

Is the bean dizzy ["dean busy"]?

When the boys come back from France, we'll have the hags flung out ["flags hung out"]!

Let me sew you to your sheet ["show you to your seat"].

Spoonerism comes from the name of the Rev. William Archibald Spooner (1844-1930), a kindly but nervous Anglican clergyman and educationalist. All the above examples were committed by (or attributed to) him.

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Off the top of my head, I can think of only one spoonerism (it might not qualify, but it's still funny); my childhood buddy Joe Bill used to say -usually to a girl- in a low voice:

"Tickle your ass with a feather?"

And when the person did a double-take and said "Excuse me?", Jody would say

"Particularly nasty weather!"

Spoonerisms remind me of Cockney Rhyming Slang.

More spoonerisms

Hamlet vs PayPal

PayPal's Terms and Conditions (including their privacy policy, acceptable use policy, eBay shipping services policy and billing agreement terms) has a longer word count at 36,275 than does Shakespeare's Hamlet, which has 31,950 words in total.

psittacism

psittacism noun [sit-uh-siz-uh m]

1. mechanical, repetitive, and meaningless speech

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There's a lot of psittacism going on now leading up to the election.