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Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

April 26, 2017

Meat Cards

Meat Cards: Business cards made from MEAT AND LASERS

From the website:

We start with 100% beef jerky, and SEAR your contact information into it with a 150 WATT CO2 LASER.

Screw die-cutting. Forget about foil, popups, or UV spot lamination. THESE business cards have two ingredients: MEAT AND LASERS.

Unlike other business cards, MEAT CARDS will retain value after the econopocalypse. Hoard and barter your calorie-rich, life-sustaining cards.

MEAT CARDS do not fit in a Rolodex, because their deliciousness CANNOT BE CONTAINED in a Rolodex.


March 27, 2017

Olive Tree Trivia

An olive tree can live over 2000 yrs.

That bit of trivia makes me hungry for some Tapenade.

Not sure that I'd want it every day for two centuries, though.

January 7, 2017

Politics, Religion and Food

I just got through reading an article linked to on Facebook - I won't link to it in this post because that's not the gist of this rant - but it was how we (people) should have a more plant-based diet.  I wouldn't disagree with that, but articles like that always start off some vicious arguments and there were plenty under the piece.  I've found that often the comments are more entertaining than the article.

That's something I've noticed since I've been online for these last 17+ years;  of course, politics and religion have always sparked some contentious debate, a long time before there were forums and message boards, but I'd say the next most hotly discussed topic is food. (and movies, TV shows and music would be close behind)

In fact, one of the first times I was ever savaged online was in a chat room and someone mentioned they were making a pineapple upside-down cake.  I mentioned that I don't care for pineapple and I was attacked before they let me explain that I have an allergy to pineapple, that it makes my throat itch. (as do several other tropical fruits, such as kiwi fruit, papaya, and sometimes oranges)

The next time I saw a "food fight" break out was over whether to put chili in beans.  The recipe said "real Texans" would never dream of it.  Personally, I don't care for beans in my chili, but I'm also a "real Texan" and enough of one to not stick my nose into someone's business - if they want to put beans in their chili, then that's fine with me.  If they invited me to dinner and their chili had beans in it, I am also enough of a Texan to not criticize my host.  No, I'd eat it and probably would ask for seconds.

(funny - I don't really like beans in my chili, but I put a can of chili - Texas Wolf Brand - when I make beans)

I recently saw a dispute over goulash, of all things.  The recipe wasn't even titled "Hungarian" but the comments got heated over just what was "authentic".    Call it what you like, call me ignorant for calling it that, but just don't call me late for supper!

I can semi-understand arguing about politics and religion, esp. if someone insults your candidate/party or your faith, but to argue about food?  Ridiculous.  I wish I could draw - I'd make a graphic of God wearing an Obama t-shirt while eating a cheeseburger as He was kicking Barney Frank and Nancy Pelosi down to Hell along with the Muslims.

That way I could piss off the Republicans, the vegans, the gays, the Democrats, and the radical Islamists in one fell swoop.

I might even draw Him with a pistol stuck in His belt, just to piss off the gun-grabbers.

November 24, 2016

Cranberry Trivia

Ripe cranberries bounce - hence their alternate name, "bounceberry".

October 11, 2016

Keep It or Toss It?

Wondering if that jar of horseradish is still good to eat? Find out at StillTasty, your ultimate shelf life guide. There's a fridge-full of other info on the site with answers to many common perishable food questions:

Can You Safely Drink Milk After the Sell-By Date?
Is it OK to Put Hot Food Directly Into the Fridge?
Are Eggs Still Safe After the Expiration Date?

(yes, yes, yes, but as for me re: the milk-ONLY after intensive sniffing and extremely cautious sipping. Personally, I would rather get slapped in the face than drink sour milk.)

September 20, 2016

The Worm Didn't Turn

Cute 404 page on The Food Channel:

I was a little disappointed I wasn't able to find the recipe for Chicken Alfredo Soup right away, but I guess it's like real life; it's better to bite into an apple and find a worm than biting into one and finding half a worm.

September 10, 2016

Cukes Cause Pukes

A little too close together in my Facebook news feed:

August 13, 2016

The Average Would Be Lower

But I bring the mean weight up:

Texas Is Not Obese!! Go Ahead, Eat That Cheese Enchilada!!

I usually am not thrifty with my posts; after all, I don't pay for the electrons or the server space, but this one should include the word of the day:

gormandize\GAWR-muhn-dahyz \ , verb;

1. To eat greedily or ravenously.

That's one of those words we fat people like to use to describe our otherwise piggish eating habits.

I "bumped" up this post because I'm now wondering if since legalizing pot, Colorado still has a low rate of obesity. Y'know, munchies and all that....

June 5, 2016

The McFarthest Spot

What's so special about this place in S. Dakota?

According to Atlas Obscura, it is the McFarthest Spot -the farthest you can be in the continental US from a McDonald's location.

From the website:

Geographically speaking, in the lower 48 United States it is impossible to get farther away from a McDonald's restaurant than this location in South Dakota. From the McFarthest Spot it would take 145 miles driving (only 120 miles as the crow flies) before a visitor could devour their next two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.

May 1, 2016

What Kind of Cheesecake Are You?

You Are a Key Lime Cheesecake

Unconventional and quirky, you live to shock people.

You see the world in very weird ways. 

Sometimes you even surprise yourself! 


April 2, 2016

Polly Want Some Cracker Trivia?

A Ritz cracker has seven holes, while a regular saltine has thirteen.

March 4, 2016

Seven Layer Dip

From one of my favorite YouTube recipe channels Allrecipes

February 13, 2016

Fwench Toast

Going through my Facebook pages feed, I noticed this on the Relish Magazine wall:

(click graphic for larger view)

Any mention of French toast always reminds me of a story told to me by a friend; he had met the friend of a woman I was dating at her house and because my date and I wanted some privacy, went home with her. (great friend!) The babysitter was there and the woman paid the young girl who was doing the sitting and after she was gone, went in to look in on her daughter asleep in her bedroom. After a few minutes, the woman came out and sat beside my friend who was waiting on the couch. One thing lead to another and...well, you get the drift, I hope.

My friend said he woke up the next morning to find the little girl standing by his side of the bed, silently staring at him, her hair mussed by sleep, a thumb stuck in her mouth and a grubby little blanket held in her other arm. They looked at each other for a while, then my friend asked: "What do you want?"

The little girl took her thumb out of her mouth and answered:

"Fwench toast."

February 10, 2016

It's Lent

"Bumped" from a couple of yrs. ago and updated*.

Not being Catholic, I am usually unaware when Lent begins. (*This year, Lent begins today and ends on March 24.) When a spate of pancake recipes hit my reader earlier this week, I was reminded that before Lent begins, there is Shrove Tuesday or "Pancake Day", when housewives would try to use up all the ingredients they couldn't use during Lent.

As I said, not being Catholic, I am not familiar with Lent, but I do know that when making pancakes, one should not over mix the wet and dry ingredients or the pancakes will become "tough".  A few lumps are all right - they'll bake out when the pancakes are cooked.

I used to brag that someone could bring up a topic and I would know a joke about it.  Since it's Lent, here's my Lent joke:

A couple had just gotten married during this time of year.  On their honeymoon night, they went to bed and the new bride eagerly reached over to her husband, but he gently pushed her away.

"I can't...it's Lent." he explained.

"That's silly." she sniffed.  "To who and for how long?"

February 8, 2016

Good News & Bad News

The bad news?  No more football for six months. (not counting the draft...and that really doesn't count)

The good news?  My email inbox will quit getting deluged with Pizza Hut adverts.

The day after the Super Bowl has always been the saddest day of the year for me.  Now, as I grow older, I care less and less about all sports, but I still enjoy football...although one has to be a bit of a masochist to remain a Cowboys fan. -sigh-  I care nothing about basketball and even less (if possible) about hockey and the only reason I like seeing baseball in the news is that it means spring is here. 

I get one, sometimes two, Pizza Hut mailings every week.  I don't eat a lot of pizza, but I signed up so I can order online and take advantage of the deals offered only to members.  This week, though, I was getting two, sometimes three separate promotional emails every day.  Enough already!  I think being a pizza delivery person would be one of the worst jobs, particularly on Super Bowl Sunday. 

Well, except for working for Roto-Rooter on the day after Thanksgiving.

I'm also glad that my recipe newsletters will focus on something else besides party dips and especially chicken wing recipes.  I never made any of them, but I read so many I started sprouting pinfeathers.  Every time I've ever seen wings on the buffet, the "drumettes" were gone by the time I got to them.  I finally figured out the best way to eat the "arm" part of the wing;  pinch off the end with the bit of cartilage and pull the two tiny bones out and then you can eat the entire thing!