From the website:
Welcome to Sound Jay's free sound effects web site! You are allowed to use the sounds on our website free of charge and royalty free in your projects but you are NOT allowed to post the sounds on any web site for others to download, link directly to individual sound files, or sell the sounds to anyone else. Remember to read Terms of Use before downloading and using the sound effects or music tracks. Most files are 16 bit stereo 44.1 kHz or 48 kHz high quality sound effects. Remember to bookmark us, as we will often add new sounds.
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June 14, 2009
Sound Jay
Computer Hell
From the email archives:
Bill Gates dies and goes to purgatory.
St. Peter says, "Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Because of that, I am going to let you decide where you want to go".
First, St. Peter shows Bill an image of Hell with beautiful women running on beaches. After that, St Peter shows Bill an image of Heaven with robed angels playing harps on clouds.
Bill chooses Hell.
About a week later, St. Peter checks in on Bill in Hell and finds him being whipped by demons.
Bill says to St. Peter, "What happened to all the beautiful women and the beaches?"
St. Peter replies, "That was just the screen saver."
June 13, 2009
prestidigitation
prestidigitation \pres-tuh-dij-uh-TAY-shuhn\ , noun:
Skill in or performance of tricks; sleight of hand.
I'm not sure it's skill, but it's certainly akin to magic that this blog has lasted as long as it has.
ToTG News is Old News
Welcome to the new news. (in the right-hand column)
I've decided to change the news feed from KFDA, the Amarillo CBS affiliate, to KVII, the Amarillo ABC affiliate.
The reason? CBS is the home of David Letterman, the gap-toothed, bitter old grouch who has a late night show on that network. Letterman recently had a Top Ten list lambasting Sarah Palin, the Alaskan governor and recent VP candidate. (article) Jokes at Palin are all fair game, even if he did say she looked like a slutty airline stewardess (you should see HIS wife; unattractive would be kind), but he also made the "joke" that Palin's daughter was knocked up by A-Rod during the seventh inning stretch when Palin and her daughter recently attended a Yankees game.
Now, I'm sure he meant Bristol, the oldest/18 yr. old daughter who had a child out of wedlock (and Dave had a child out of wedlock, too), but the problem was it was Palin's younger daughter Willow who attended the game with her mom.
Willow is 14.
The "joke" wouldn't have been funny even if Bristol had been the one attending the game, and although Letterman issued an obviously insincere apology, the damage has been done.
I quit watching Letterman years and years ago; I used to be a huge fan, getting up earlier than I usually would before my evening tour shift on the rig to watch his morning comedy show and after he moved to nights, hurrying home to watch. Shortly after he switched networks from NBC to ABC, I changed shifts and rarely got to see his show, then managed to catch a few back during the start of this decade and found him to have turned hateful and mean and into a left-wing tool.
What's astounding are the posts I've seen defending Letterman. I'd like to know if jokes about Obama's daughters getting raped would be all right?
Of course they wouldn't.
I've seen thousands of cases of hypocrisy from the right-wing, especially from the "Religious Right" but the MSM never, ever points out the many instances of that same sort of hypocrisy from the left. How can they defend the indefensible? Don Imus was forced to resign because of his remarks; I think CBS should do the same and cancel Letterman. Imus' remarks were bigoted, but Letterman was joking about rape. Which one is worse?
If you have a single functioning brain cell, you'll know which one.
Sure, my action won't affect the network one iota, nor will there be a molecule's worth of difference to the local station, but it's a stand on principle.
I may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I recognize a real bastard when I see one.
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