celerity

celerity \suh-LAIR-uh-tee\ , noun:
1. Rapidity of motion or action; quickness; swiftness.

---

To tell you the truth, I was fast in my youth, but these days my celerity is basically hilarity.

I'm Blue All the Time

You Are Navy Blue

You're a true adventurer. You constantly find yourself drawn to new experiences, people, and places. Sometimes you feel quite scattered and bored. If something exciting isn't going on, you feel a bit lost.

What Color Blue Are You?

Blue - LeAnn Rimes

Stamp of Disapproval

From the email archives:

---

The Postal Services created a stamp with a picture of President Obama on it, but they noticed that the stamp was not sticking to envelopes.

This enraged the President, who demanded a full investigation. After a month of testing, and $1.73 million in congressional spending, a special Presidential commission presented the following findings.




1. The stamp is in perfect order
2. There is nothing wrong with the glue
3. People are spitting on the wrong side

Love Is On Sale

From the spam folder:

---

A discount doesn't help when you're as emotionally bankrupt as I am.

Carhartt Giveaway

The World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl

"Will you marry me?"


The girl said "NO!" And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END