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March 4, 2009

Withering Weather

This is a screenshot of the weather module on my Excite start page. It's the weather from my best online friend's places of residence. Here in Pampa it was darn warm today; warmer than where my big sister lives in Denton, several hundred miles to the south of here.



The high temps aren't all that unusual for this time of the year in the Texas Panhandle; just a few days ago the high didn't get above freezing.

As the old saw goes: "Don't like the weather here? Just wait a few hours."

I'd make some quip about global warming, but I bet my friends in N.H., N.C. and the UK wouldn't think it so funny, especially as they're freezin' their butts off. My friend in New Zealand is heading into fall while we're starting spring.

2 Bottles of Vodka + 1 Kiss =

Woman 'bit off boyfriend's tongue'

The article says the couple had gone grocery shopping, got some food, the two bottles of booze, then she wanted a kiss.

Maybe she had left tongue off of the shopping list?

He should've picked up some brains while he was there.

I take these crazy women's names and put 'em in a little black book so I'll know to avoid them in the future. I know, I know, she's way the heck over in England, but that's barely enough space between me 'n crazy women.

Sometimes I will strike up a conversation with a guy and he'll tell me he just got divorced and will elaborate on the crazy stuff she did while/after they were breaking up. I always ask the guy if she's taking her maiden name back and would he please tell me what it is?

They almost always get offended, thinking that I'm going to go after her. They always laugh when I tell them about my "list" I keep and that I want to know what her name is if/when I run into her.

I've dated enough crazy women in my life, far more than my fair share. Some other guy needs to pick up the slack.

My Every Day Fortune



(to be honest, I read this wrong the first time)

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I have a carnival funhouse mirror; it doesn't take any weight off of me, but it makes me look goofier than I already am. My non-existent self-esteem can handle it.

I did this to a photo of me, but I don't think it made the pic any lighter.