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February 29, 2012

Having a Ball



Ouch. At least he still has one. OTOH, he'll never be able to again say "Y'know, I'd give my right testicle to...."

Suing for the loss of a testicle - can't say as I blame him. I'd just hope the lost testicle wouldn't be introduced as evidence in court.

He's really lucky to have lost just the one. If he'd lost both, he would have to change his name to "Sue".

I published this post, then remembered a joke. (What else is new?)

Two cannibals had ambushed a missionary and had sat down to eat him. One cannibal told the other that when they ate someone, he always got less because the other ate faster and always got to eat more. They agreed to start on opposite ends and finish off in the middle.

Munching along, the cannibal who started at the head said to the one who started at the feet: "Hey, how's it goin'?"

"I'm having a ball!" replied the other cannibal.

 "Slow down!" admonished the one cannibal. "You're still eating too fast!"

Update: saw this article earlier: Crocodile bites off man's testes
Ouch.

Wow, my internet has been going nuts here lately. Just saw this recommendation when I was shopping Amazon earlier.

3B Scientific W43014 Testicle Self Exam Form


Wonder if they know something I don't?


Wow, too strange. Got this email earlier:

INTERESTING OBSERVATION

1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING.

3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.

 And....

6. The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.

THE AMAZING CONCLUSION:

The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

February 28, 2012

It Sucks When It Blows

Got out to pay some bills earlier and driving back home, saw this stop sign; it looked like the scene from "Close Encounters" where the alien ship is making the mailboxes and signs shake. It's a little blurry because I took it looking through the windshield. (I didn't want to step outside!) The weatherman just said Amarillo had had gusts of 62mph.



Just up the street, heading into town, is a reduced speed zone down to 35 mph. I got off the gas, but had to use the brake to get under the speed limit!

Too bad I wasn't making a trip heading that direction...would've got the best gas mileage ever! The only people who love these sort of days are those who own wind turbines.

February 20, 2012

How Long - Ace

Was going through my mp3 jukebox and listened to this song I hadn't thought of in a long time. Always loved the melody and the lyrics which surely came from a heartbreak of the songwriter. I read a little about it while searching for the video; I was surprised to see it wasn't as big a hit in the UK as it was in the US.

February 14, 2012

Mystery Ingredient

One of my favorite recipe sites is Recipe Lion. It offers a newsletter, a recipe box to save your favorites in, specialty and holiday recipe collections in downloadable pdf format and many other features.

In today's newsletter, one recipe caught my eye: (because I'm a poor man) Poor Man's Steak. I clicked on the link in the email and went to the site, hoping that it would be a recipe worthy of saving. It seemed easy enough and sounded like it would be a tasty and inexpensive dish to prepare.  I saved the recipe, then had a closer look at the ingredients. Here's what I saw:


One of what? A can of some other soup? A diced onion? The finger you lopped off slicing up the loaf? A mystery ingredient, indeed.

I worry about "mystery ingredients" when I get fast food at places where it looks like just teenagers are working

Holidays for the Lonely

Laura Kightlinger: Holidays for the Lonely:

It goes: Christmas, New Year's Eve and Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone? Those are all days when you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's -- boom! there's Valentine's Day for you. I think there should be just one more holiday after Valentine's Day, just for the stragglers -- and it should be called, Who Could Love You?

February 12, 2012

auscultation

From the Word of the Day:

auscultation - aus·cul·ta·tion [aw-skuhl-tey-shuhn];noun

Medicine/Medical .

1. the act of listening, either directly or through a stethoscope or other instrument, to sounds within the body as a method of diagnosis.

I'm sure this would be a great technique for diagnosing heart or lung problems, perhaps even something to do with the circulatory system,  but since I'm no medical expert, I can't think of any other problems that could be figured out by sound. When my bones creak and pop, I know that's just a sign of old age.

I guess having a chronic gas problem could be diagnosed by sound, but I figure smelling it would be the first clue.