Anyone who knows me or has followed this blog for any length of time knows I am a Dallas Cowboy fan. (there's a Cowboys news module in the right-hand side column) I don't post much about them because frankly, it's been hard to be a fan for the last decade or so and I don't want or need trolls coming in and blasting my favorite team. I know they've sucked for a long time, I don't need to be reminded of it.
That said, I'm still a fan, although not as much of one as I once was. As I've grown older, I've become less and less interested in football...and all sports, for that matter. I try to watch the Cowboys on TV, but if they're playing badly I have no problem changing the channel. I've done that a lot over the last 15 years. I'm no fair-weather fan, but I'm also not a glutton for punishment.
I still keep up with them, however, reading articles about them on the Dallas Cowboys website and subscribe to a few fan sites in my reader. I was glad to see this article yesterday: Cowboys Sign Long Snapper LaDouceur To Five-Year Deal. I couldn't find the exact terms of the contract, at least none that sounded correct. Most sources said it was a five-year deal for $4 million, but LaDouceur has been in the league long enough to get at least the veteran minimum wage and the math doesn't work for that number.
Doing some quick research, I found that he made $790,000 for the 2012 season. Considering that all he does is "long snap", I decided to research a little more to see how much he made per actual play he was on the field. I figure he played during 31 field goal attempts, 68 punts and 38 PAT (subtracting three 2 point tries) for a total of 137 plays....without making a bad snap. That works out to $5,766.42/play. Not bad wages, huh?
That made me wonder about other player's wages per play. I thought about figuring what certain of my favorite players made, but the task would have been daunting, trying to find out the exact number of times they were on the field, taking off their substitutions, injuries, etc. It was fairly easy to calculate the number for the team's highest profile player and quarterback, Tony Romo.
(and I don't care what other people think of him, he's a favorite of mine and a good player. I don't care if anyone disagrees with me on his worth to the team; you can point out his mistakes, but I'll point out your lack of football knowledge.)
According to the Cowboy website's statistics, Dallas ran 1,049 offensive plays in 2012. The site says the backup QB Orton attempted 10 passes, but there's no breakdown of how many times he handed off the ball. So, let's just say for the matter of simplicity that Tony Romo was on the field for 925 plays, taking off the extra point kicks, adding back the 2 point tries, taking away the punt plays and estimating however many times Orton handed off. 925 is close enough for me.
Romo's listed salary for 2012 was $9,000,000. Now, I'm not sure, what with the signing bonus and the "funny money" salary cap implications, if it was more or less than that amount, but again, for the sake of simplicity, let's go with the figure of nine million. That means he got paid $9729.73 per play.
(for all you anal-retentive stat freaks: if you have a problem with my figures for that or any of the other calculations I've done, send me an email with detailed corrections, screen captures of your calculations and verified links to your sources to: idonotgiveadamn@buzzoff.net)
That's a pretty decent wage, wouldn't you say? Especially considering that a good percentage of those plays were just handing off the ball and not getting touched. Then again, there were far too many plays like this one:
That wasn't even close to the worst hit he took this last year, but I'm sure he would have given up part of his per-play salary to have avoided that hit. Hell, I would have given it ALL back, plus another couple of play's worth. LaDouceur might make only half of what Romo does per snap, but it's a wonder Romo's neck hasn't been snapped.
I just noticed an odd thing on this blog's Feedjit counter; someone had multiple hits on the 7-Layer Mexican Dip recipe I had posted quite a few years ago. I've never checked search engines, but that post must be up near the top when people are looking for that particular recipe because it's one of the most-visited posts. (sometimes even more than "gay dwarfs" or "sister's feet".)
I wonder what would cause that? I'm sure they didn't click the post that many times, so it must be some sort of glitch.
Whatever it was, it reminded me of this classic scene from Seinfeld. (the best version didn't allow for embedding, so I had to settle for this one which cuts out the scuffle between George and the other guy. Still funny, though.)
Japanese artist Isao Hashimoto has created a beautiful, undeniably scary time-lapse map of the 2053 nuclear explosions which have taken place between 1945 and 1998, beginning with the Manhattan Project's "Trinity" test near Los Alamos and concluding with Pakistan's nuclear tests in May of 1998. This leaves out North Korea's two alleged nuclear tests in this past decade (the legitimacy of both of which is not 100% clear).
Each nation gets a blip and a flashing dot on the map whenever they detonate a nuclear weapon, with a running tally kept on the top and bottom bars of the screen. Hashimoto, who began the project in 2003, says that he created it with the goal of showing"the fear and folly of nuclear weapons." It starts really slow — if you want to see real action, skip ahead to 1962 or so — but the buildup becomes overwhelming.
You are a fun loving person who is able to laugh at all aspects of life.
Some may think you're light-hearted, but you're also able to be amusingly dark.
You can see both the best and worst in people. More importantly, you understand how absurd life can be.
You find a well written comedy to be intelligent and even insightful. Anyone can make a good movie, but only a genius can make a hilarious movie.
I'll admit to have been a drama queen about certain things before. With that disclaimer out of the way, I'll also confess that I have raked people over the coals for saying they loved winter and the snow. I usually just tell them it's a sure bet they never have had to work out in it or had to drive miles and miles in it. Sure, snow is "pretty", if you can sit by the roaring fireplace looking out at the winter wonderland with a glass of brandy in one hand. It's also a certainty that people who say that never fretted about their heating bill or had their pipes freeze. Go ahead and love winter if you want, it's a free country, but as for me, I'm always looking forward to spring.
This video serves as a reminder why I don't like winter.
