Bottoms Up!

From the archives:

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A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their Colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before!"

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Oh boy! That was sphincterrific!"

5. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

6. "You know in Arkansas we're now legally married."

7. "Any sign of the trapped miners,  Chief?"

8. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

9. "Hey, now I know how a Muppet feels!"

10. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"

11. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

12. "You used to be an executive at Enron didn't you?"

And the best one of them all...

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is in fact not up there?"

It's NOT BBQ Day

It is:

There Is a Difference

Armed Forces Day (3rd Sat. of May) For those who currently wear the uniform

Veterans Day (Nov. 11th) For those who used to wear the uniform

Memorial Day (last Mon. of May) For those who never made it out of uniform

My Bing Birthday

My sister sent me a card and an Amazon gift card and some of my Facebook friends wished me a Happy Birthday...but only after my sis posted a birthday message. (I don't have my birthday listed) I've also received birthday wishes from various newsletters and a few coupons in the mail from companies such as American Spirit and Black & Mild.  I'm pretty sure tobacco companies aren't concerned about me having MORE birthdays, y'know?

I opened up Bing early this a.m. to finish up this month's searches to get points for my regular $5 Amazon Gift Card, a great prize for reading and searching online, something I'd do for free anyway, and I saw this, pretty cool:

I clicked the "Make a Wish" link and got this:

I hope my wish comes true because I wished I'd win the lottery. I DID win $8 on last night's Powerball drawing, but I'm hopin' for a little more.

A few tens of millions more, actually.

100 Iconic Movie Lines

The 100 Most Iconic Movie Lines of All Time

Caricature of the Day

Do you recognize this star of Caricature Zone?

Give up? View the answer!

HINT: It's (usually) the celeb's birthday.