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June 4, 2009

The Oreo Personality Quiz

From the email archives:

The Oreo Personality Quiz

Psychologists have discovered that the manner in which people eat Oreo cookies provides great insight into their personalities. Choose which method best describes your favorite method of eating Oreos:

1. The whole thing all at once.
2. One bite at a time.
3. Slow and methodical nibbles examining the results of each bite afterward.
4. In little feverous nibbles.
5. Dunked in some liquid (milk, coffee...).
6. Twisted apart, the inside, then the cookie.
7. Twisted apart, the inside, and toss the cookie.
8. Just the cookie, not the inside.
9. I just like to lick them, not eat them.
10. I don't have a favorite way because I don't like Oreo.


Your Personality:

1. The whole thing. This means you consume life with abandon, you are fun to be with, exciting, carefree with some hint of recklessness. You are totally irresponsible. No one should trust you with their children.

2. One bite at a time. You are lucky to be one of the 5.4 billion other people who eat their Oreos this very same way. Just like them, you lack imagination, but that's okay, not to worry, you're normal.

3. Slow and methodical. You follow the rules. You're very tidy and orderly. You're very meticulous in every detail with every thing you do to the point of being anal retentive and irritating to others. Stay out of the fast lane if you're only going to go the speed limit.

4. Feverous nibbles. Your boss likes you because you get your work done quickly. You always have a million things to do and never enough time to do them. Mental breakdowns and suicides run in your family. Valium and Ritalin would do you good.

5. Dunked. Every one likes you because you are always up beat. You like to sugar coat unpleasant experiences and rationalize bad situations into good ones. You are in total denial about the shambles you call a life. You have a propensity towards narcotic addiction.

6. Twisted apart, the inside, and then the cookie. You have a highly curious nature. You take pleasure in breaking things apart to find out how they work, though not always able to put them back together, so you destroy all the evidence of your activities. You deny your involvement when things go wrong. You are a compulsive liar and exhibit deviant, if not criminal, behavior.

7. Twisted apart, the inside, and then toss the cookie. You are good at business and take risk that pay off. You take what you want and throw the rest away. You are greedy, selfish, mean, and lack feelings for others. You should be ashamed of yourself. But that's ok, you don't care, you got yours.

8. Just the cookie, not the inside. You enjoy pain.

9. I just like to lick them, not eat them. Stay away from small furry animals and seek professional medical help - immediately.

10. I don't have a favorite way, I don't like Oreo cookies. You probably come from a rich family, and like to wear nice things, and go to up-scale restaurants. You are particular and fussy about the things you buy, own, and wear. Things have to be just right. You like to be pampered. You are a prim. Nobody likes you.

June 3, 2009

espy

espy \ih-SPY\ , transitive verb:
To catch sight of; to perceive with the eyes; to discover, as a distant object partly concealed, or not obvious to notice; to see at a glance; to discern unexpectedly; to spy; as, to espy land; to espy a man in a crowd.



I can use this in a sentence:

"I espy the ESPY Awards on TV."

I've Been Everywhere - Brian Burns

Texas version

The Caveman & Me

 photo caveman_scratching_head_zpspfgpiagn.gif

That caveman is having to perpetually scratch
Must be a flea in that matted hairy patch
He's got so much hair, he can barely see
A lot more hair, I admit, than I have on me

Remember the time when long hair was the rage?
(If you do, have to say, you're tellin' your age)
Boy's hair was often much longer than girl's
And some guys heads had many more curls

I never did fit in with that hirsute crowd
They'd tell me "Go away, dude! Flattops not allowed!"
Then they'd realize something, and all start to stare
My head was what was flat, and it wasn't my hair.

I have to admit I've never had much on top
And three hairs on my chest isn't much of a mop
Social Security gets closer with each passing day
A question: when I retire, do the pimples go away?

Some kids are cruel, they like to poke fun
"Your head's so shiny, thought it was the sun!"
I should tell 'em off, tell 'em the truth
But I let 'em go on being ignorant youth

You see, I've a theory, I think it's correct
You'll agree when you hear it, I hope and expect
Remember the cave man, all covered with hair?
Well look around all over, you'll find him nowhere.

Neanderthals lived many centuries ago
(From 7th grade science, I sat in the back row)
Darwin's evolution or God's Master Plan
Whatever it was, there's no hairy man.

No, through the ages, we've lost most of our hair
Surely there can be no argument there?
Hair was useful when the cold wind blew
Fig leaves for underwear were all that they knew.

We need less hair now since we've invented clothes
(Although I'd love less hair in my ears and my nose)
So, the only answer that can ever really matter
Us baldies are higher on the evolutionary ladder

Yep, balding guys like me are just farther along
And I dare anyone else to prove that I'm wrong.
There's something else that I'd like to be known:
Less hair equals more testosterone.

Something has just now come to me
That caveman up there is EATING THAT FLEA !!!
I'd sure like to know "Whazzup with that?"
Guess he learned that by watching a cat.

I bet he learned about fishing by watching a bear
The tiger taught him danger when approaching its lair
The lion taught him hunting, about catching its prey
(And I'd rather hunt through the night and sleep through the day)

Wolves made them climb trees, get up off the ground
Dogs as we know 'em were nowhere to be found
And I for one, am most mightily glad
And some of you folks...well, you probably are sad.

I'll tell you the reason, the argument why
I'm happy there were no dogs around for that primitive guy
You might think me crazy, think I'm totally nuts
I'm overjoyed we never learned to lick our own butts.


June 2, 2009

Comprehensive Blog Glossary

From the website:

In the blogging world there are all sort of unique terminology (like Kizzog) and abbreviations for just about any task, service or product. To help keep you up-to-date on the words and there meanings we have created a comprehensive blog glossary or "blogssary" as it's know in the blogging world.

Quad-Lock Unit Converter



From the website:


Unit Converter is a freeware tool that can take care of all your unit conversions even when offline. It has an easy-to-use interface and contains more than 900 units commonly encountered while solving engineering or everyday conversion problems. Other features include a function to Find Units and a Smart Input box that evaluates fractions, complex expressions etc. Everything is built into a single executable file so no uninstaller is necessary. Its small file size makes it easy to distribute among friends and co-workers.

Quad-Lock Unit Converter