Every year, the Earth becomes about twelve tons heavier because of meteorites landing.
June 17, 2017
The First Thing I Ever Bought
Well, one of the first things I ever bought with my own hard-earned money. I also bought a bunch of fireworks.
I bought the album, not the girl. She looked even better inside the cover.
 |
| From Top of Texas Gazette |
I bought the album, not the girl. She looked even better inside the cover.
June 16, 2017
Angry Spam
This was in my spam folder this morning, and I'd have to say it's a novel approach to getting someone to click on a link.
I will obfuscate some of the cursing with hash tags / # # but I found it odd that the spammer did it with asterisks / *** on the "F bombs" they dropped. I mean...in for a penny, in for a pound, right? Why do it on the F bombs but not the other equally offensive cursing?
The subject line was this: I WILL REPORT YOU. YOU PIECE OF S##T...F.U..
Like I said, it got my attention, more than "Remember me and the passionate night we spent together?" or "Grow It Larger!"spam I normally get.
Riley Johnson RileyJokVzs@gtwabzsv.he via server.lifassurance.org
Riley Johnson reply@boopiler.com
Hey,
Stop stalking me and my friend or I will report you. You piece of s##t, c##k-su##er douche. I do not know why you are doing this! You slept together once, only once. It does not mean anything. Have not you heard of hook up? So, f*** off and leave us alone
F*** You.
How did I know it was spam? Well, if someone is THAT angry, they're more likely to come see you in person and punch you in the nose. Personally, I'd rather spend the night in jail than have my ISP ban me forever for sending out threats. Secondly, I don't know anyone named Riley Johnson. Third, if the spammer only knew how long it had been since I last had a "hook up" or slept with anyone "only once" (or at all), they'd not bother sending me any spam.
Plus, whoever it is Riley is with, he/she sure is cheating a LOT on him.
I will obfuscate some of the cursing with hash tags / # # but I found it odd that the spammer did it with asterisks / *** on the "F bombs" they dropped. I mean...in for a penny, in for a pound, right? Why do it on the F bombs but not the other equally offensive cursing?
The subject line was this: I WILL REPORT YOU. YOU PIECE OF S##T...F.U..
Like I said, it got my attention, more than "Remember me and the passionate night we spent together?" or "Grow It Larger!"spam I normally get.
Riley Johnson RileyJokVzs@gtwabzsv.he via server.lifassurance.org
Riley Johnson reply@boopiler.com
Hey,
Stop stalking me and my friend or I will report you. You piece of s##t, c##k-su##er douche. I do not know why you are doing this! You slept together once, only once. It does not mean anything. Have not you heard of hook up? So, f*** off and leave us alone
F*** You.
How did I know it was spam? Well, if someone is THAT angry, they're more likely to come see you in person and punch you in the nose. Personally, I'd rather spend the night in jail than have my ISP ban me forever for sending out threats. Secondly, I don't know anyone named Riley Johnson. Third, if the spammer only knew how long it had been since I last had a "hook up" or slept with anyone "only once" (or at all), they'd not bother sending me any spam.
Plus, whoever it is Riley is with, he/she sure is cheating a LOT on him.
June 15, 2017
Color Me Smooth
|
You Are Smooth |
 You are totally irresistible. You can be as quirky, colorful, and wild as you want to be! You enjoy taking risks, and you've made a few big miscalculations over the years. You're not afraid to mess up. Your mistakes just give you character. People love that you're perfectly imperfect. You're happy with yourself, and that's all that matters. |
June 12, 2017
Can You Hear Me Now?
Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, never phoned his wife or his mother.
They were both deaf.
And, in case you didn't get the rather insensitive joke in the title of this post, here's its origin:
...although he's since gone over to Sprint.
And a ToTG public service announcement: if someone calls you and asks you a question or speaks very faintly and you complain they need to speak up and they "make an adjustment" and in a louder voice "Can you hear me now?", do NOT say "Yes." which might lead to them using that to change your long-distance service. Some sources on the 'net say it's not a proven scam, but best to not take chances. At the least, you'll be telling the possible scammer on the other end of the line that it's a working phone number.
Personally, if I don't recognize the number, I don't answer.
They were both deaf.
...although he's since gone over to Sprint.
And a ToTG public service announcement: if someone calls you and asks you a question or speaks very faintly and you complain they need to speak up and they "make an adjustment" and in a louder voice "Can you hear me now?", do NOT say "Yes." which might lead to them using that to change your long-distance service. Some sources on the 'net say it's not a proven scam, but best to not take chances. At the least, you'll be telling the possible scammer on the other end of the line that it's a working phone number.
Personally, if I don't recognize the number, I don't answer.
June 11, 2017
Three Classes of Men
 | There are three classes of men; lovers of wisdom, lovers of honor, and lovers of gain. - Plato |
June 7, 2017
June 6, 2017
You've Got Another Thing Comin'-Judas Priest
A "bump" because the original video had been taken down.
It's also worth a bump because it's such a kick-ass tune.
It's also worth a bump because it's such a kick-ass tune.
May 29, 2017
A Very Bing Birthday
Among family, friends and my online pals. I've had a pretty good birthday so far. Several of my email newsletters have sent me special emails, also wishing me a happy birthday. (and I also got an email in my spam folder from a "young woman" who wished me a happy birthday and would give me a "special present" if I clicked on the enclosed link. I was tempted, but...)
Bing also sent me birthday wishes earlier today on their home page; the images were animated, but I just took screen shots.
Make a wish? Sure, so I clicked the button and got this:
I don't know how magical Bing is, but if my birthday wish comes true, I will be a lottery winner sometime this week. I hope it's the Powerball because it's MUCH larger than the Mega Millions or the Texas Lotto jackpots.
Bing also sent me birthday wishes earlier today on their home page; the images were animated, but I just took screen shots.
Make a wish? Sure, so I clicked the button and got this:
May 24, 2017
You Wear it Well - Rod Stewart & Faces
This sounds a WHOLE lot like "Maggie May".
Maybe that's why he had to read the lyrics off a piece of paper.
She Wears it Well
There are 7 points on the crown of the Statue of Liberty. They represent the 7 continents and 7 seas of the world.
May 23, 2017
R.I.P. Roger Moore
R.I.P. Roger Moore (1927-2017)
While I liked Sean Connery in the iconic role, he was the "rough-edged" James Bond; Moore added the debonair, suave quality Connery did not possess.
While I liked Sean Connery in the iconic role, he was the "rough-edged" James Bond; Moore added the debonair, suave quality Connery did not possess.
May 22, 2017
ultracrepidarian
ultracrepidarian
adjective [uhl-truh-kerp-i-dair-ee-uh-n]
1. noting or pertaining to a person who criticizes, judges, or gives advice outside the area of his or her expertise
2. an ultracrepidarian person
I see a LOT of ultracrepidarians every day while online.
The Internet is full of 'em; childless people who know what's best for your child, people who comment about politics yet only listen to one side of an issue and just about every conspiratorial nutjob there is on the World Wide Web.
May 14, 2017
May 12, 2017
The Difference An "R" Makes
Too funny and a weird coincidence: I was just checking my Facebook news feed and saw one of those hilarious greeting cards on a wall, but what they described on it happened to me just yesterday!
I was flipping through the channels and stopped on Batman Begins but it had already been on for thirty minutes or so and I wanted to watch the entire thing, so I didn't stay long. I watched long enough to see a scene with the young Jim Gordon and the actor looked familiar so I went to IMDb to see the cast of characters and found out the actor was Gary Oldman. To be honest, I wasn't all that familiar with him until his recent role as Sirius Black in several of the Harry Potter movies. I had seen him in several of his earlier movies, such as JFK and Hannibal, but I guess he just didn't make that much of an impression on me or I didn't recognize him in the different roles.
I went to Google to view some of his photographs just to see how he's aged over the years and how he looked in other movie roles. I quickly typed in his name, but made a typo.
Trust me, you don't really want to view the pics of "Gay Oldman". (well, maybe you DO, but I sure didn't.)
I was flipping through the channels and stopped on Batman Begins but it had already been on for thirty minutes or so and I wanted to watch the entire thing, so I didn't stay long. I watched long enough to see a scene with the young Jim Gordon and the actor looked familiar so I went to IMDb to see the cast of characters and found out the actor was Gary Oldman. To be honest, I wasn't all that familiar with him until his recent role as Sirius Black in several of the Harry Potter movies. I had seen him in several of his earlier movies, such as JFK and Hannibal, but I guess he just didn't make that much of an impression on me or I didn't recognize him in the different roles.
I went to Google to view some of his photographs just to see how he's aged over the years and how he looked in other movie roles. I quickly typed in his name, but made a typo.
Trust me, you don't really want to view the pics of "Gay Oldman". (well, maybe you DO, but I sure didn't.)
May 8, 2017
April 28, 2017
Losing Your Head Over a Female
Males of some praying mantis species cannot copulate while its head is attached. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
I guess I'm lucky; I've just had my heart ripped out.
April 27, 2017
April 26, 2017
Meat Cards
Meat Cards: Business cards made from MEAT AND LASERS
From the website:
We start with 100% beef jerky, and SEAR your contact information into it with a 150 WATT CO2 LASER.
Screw die-cutting. Forget about foil, popups, or UV spot lamination. THESE business cards have two ingredients: MEAT AND LASERS.
Unlike other business cards, MEAT CARDS will retain value after the econopocalypse. Hoard and barter your calorie-rich, life-sustaining cards.
MEAT CARDS do not fit in a Rolodex, because their deliciousness CANNOT BE CONTAINED in a Rolodex.
meatcards.com
From the website:
We start with 100% beef jerky, and SEAR your contact information into it with a 150 WATT CO2 LASER.
Screw die-cutting. Forget about foil, popups, or UV spot lamination. THESE business cards have two ingredients: MEAT AND LASERS.
Unlike other business cards, MEAT CARDS will retain value after the econopocalypse. Hoard and barter your calorie-rich, life-sustaining cards.
MEAT CARDS do not fit in a Rolodex, because their deliciousness CANNOT BE CONTAINED in a Rolodex.
meatcards.com
April 23, 2017
Older Than Dirt Quiz
From the 
archives
archives
How many of these can you remember?
Get your score at the end of the quiz.
1. Blackjack chewing gum
2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
3. Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
5. Coffee shops or diners with table side jukeboxes
6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines on the telephone
8 Newsreels before the movie
9. P.F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels...if you were fortunate)
12. Peashooters
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15.S&H green stamps
16. Hi-fi's
17. Metal ice trays with lever
18. Mimeograph paper
19. Blue flashbulb
20. Packards
21. Roller skate keys
22.Cork popguns
23. Drive-ins
24. Studebakers
25. Wash tub wringers
If you remembered 0-5 = You're still young
If you remembered 6-10 = You are getting older
If you remembered 11-15 = Don't tell your age,
If you remembered 16-25 = You're older than dirt!
Get your score at the end of the quiz.
1. Blackjack chewing gum
2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
3. Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
5. Coffee shops or diners with table side jukeboxes
6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines on the telephone
8 Newsreels before the movie
9. P.F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels...if you were fortunate)
12. Peashooters
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15.S&H green stamps
16. Hi-fi's
17. Metal ice trays with lever
18. Mimeograph paper
19. Blue flashbulb
20. Packards
21. Roller skate keys
22.Cork popguns
23. Drive-ins
24. Studebakers
25. Wash tub wringers
If you remembered 0-5 = You're still young
If you remembered 6-10 = You are getting older
If you remembered 11-15 = Don't tell your age,
If you remembered 16-25 = You're older than dirt!
April 20, 2017
Cleverbot
Cleverbot - Chat with a bot about anything and everything - AI learns from people, in context, and imitates.
From Wiki: Cleverbot is a web application that uses an artificial intelligence algorithm to have conversations with humans. It was created by the British AI scientist Rollo Carpenter, who also created Jabberwacky, a similar web application. It is unique in the sense that it learns from humans, remembering words within its AI. In its first decade Cleverbot held several thousand conversations with Carpenter and his associates. Since launching on the web in 1997, the number of conversations held has exceeded 150 million.
April 18, 2017
Please Take a Moment
To read this bit of trivia.
Actually, it shouldn't take you that long (unless you went to the same school I did) because technically a "moment" is 90 seconds.
From Broken Secrets:
The first reference comes from 1398, found in the Oxford English Dictionary. Cornish writer John of Trevisa wrote that there are 40 moments in an hour (hence 90 seconds each). Oxford has since replaced it with, “a very brief period of time.”
Actually, it shouldn't take you that long (unless you went to the same school I did) because technically a "moment" is 90 seconds.
From Broken Secrets:
The first reference comes from 1398, found in the Oxford English Dictionary. Cornish writer John of Trevisa wrote that there are 40 moments in an hour (hence 90 seconds each). Oxford has since replaced it with, “a very brief period of time.”
April 17, 2017
Sleepy Dolphins
Dolphins shut down half of their brains when they sleep, sleeping with one eye open.
April 15, 2017
The Leftovers
Only one more day until the 3rd - and final -season of The Leftovers debuts! (Sunday night on HBO)
From Wiki: The Leftovers starts three years after a global event called the "Sudden Departure", the inexplicable, simultaneous disappearance of 140 million people, 2% of the world's population, on October 14, 2011. Following that event, mainstream religions declined, and a number of cults emerged, most notably the Guilty Remnant.
The story focuses primarily on the Garvey family and their acquaintances in the fictional town of Mapleton, New York. Kevin Garvey is the Chief of Police. His wife Laurie has joined the Guilty Remnant. Their son Tommy has left home for college, and their daughter Jill is acting out. The second season moves the main characters to the fictional town of Jarden, Texas.
The third season begins in Texas, but the main characters are moving to Australia, as evidenced in this teaser clip.
I wasn't for sure if I was going to like this show, at first thinking it was going to be some sort of rehash of the Left Behind series of books and movies, but it soon became clear that while there are religious overtones, they're subtle and the main religion is the cult, the (extremely creepy!) Guilty Remnant.
As is the case with many TV shows and particularly movies, the soundtrack adds significantly to the mood. The first season used The Leftovers Piano Theme - Max Richter for the intro and variations are played prominently throughout the episodes. The second season's intro was one of my favorite tunes, Let The Mystery Be by Iris DeMent. (Opening credits for the 2nd season) I'm not only looking forward to this finale season, but also to hear what new music they use. Another teaser clip has ABBA's "SOS" - my favorite tune of the Swedish group. A pop tune, sure, but seems to fit perfectly, same for the Richter piece composed for the series and DeMent's not-quite-religious (perhaps even Agnostic) ballad.
IMDb entry for The Leftovers
Official website (HBO)
From Wiki: The Leftovers starts three years after a global event called the "Sudden Departure", the inexplicable, simultaneous disappearance of 140 million people, 2% of the world's population, on October 14, 2011. Following that event, mainstream religions declined, and a number of cults emerged, most notably the Guilty Remnant.
The story focuses primarily on the Garvey family and their acquaintances in the fictional town of Mapleton, New York. Kevin Garvey is the Chief of Police. His wife Laurie has joined the Guilty Remnant. Their son Tommy has left home for college, and their daughter Jill is acting out. The second season moves the main characters to the fictional town of Jarden, Texas.
The third season begins in Texas, but the main characters are moving to Australia, as evidenced in this teaser clip.
I wasn't for sure if I was going to like this show, at first thinking it was going to be some sort of rehash of the Left Behind series of books and movies, but it soon became clear that while there are religious overtones, they're subtle and the main religion is the cult, the (extremely creepy!) Guilty Remnant.
As is the case with many TV shows and particularly movies, the soundtrack adds significantly to the mood. The first season used The Leftovers Piano Theme - Max Richter for the intro and variations are played prominently throughout the episodes. The second season's intro was one of my favorite tunes, Let The Mystery Be by Iris DeMent. (Opening credits for the 2nd season) I'm not only looking forward to this finale season, but also to hear what new music they use. Another teaser clip has ABBA's "SOS" - my favorite tune of the Swedish group. A pop tune, sure, but seems to fit perfectly, same for the Richter piece composed for the series and DeMent's not-quite-religious (perhaps even Agnostic) ballad.
IMDb entry for The Leftovers
Official website (HBO)
April 12, 2017
April 8, 2017
April 7, 2017
Dear Gifty
sweety gifty sweetygifty1y@gmail.com
Hello handsome,How are you feeling today...My name is Gifty and would like to chat and get to know more about you for us to see where it goes,am single and looking for my soul mate..let me know if your"re interested...hope to hear from you soon...
Most of my spam of this nature has been w/out pics here lately, but at least this one sent some w/ this mail:
(Click any pic for larger view)
Dear Gifty,
You're a nice lookin' young woman, but as with most of these emails, I suspect you're actually some 37 yr. old Russian spammer sitting in a chilly flat in Moscow who lifted these photos off some poor girl's social media page and if we DID actually exchange emails, I'm sure you'll be wanting me to send you some money or at least to direct me to some pay-for-porn website.
Be that as it may, if you ARE actually "Gifty", I'd be less-than-honest if I didn't point out that I'm certainly old enough to be your grandfather. Thanks for the offer, though, but I'll have to pass.
"How do I feel"? More than a little wary, sweetheart. I'm just too old to deal with an STD at my age. That would be the Gifty than just keeps on giftying.
Regards,
Mike
Hello handsome,How are you feeling today...My name is Gifty and would like to chat and get to know more about you for us to see where it goes,am single and looking for my soul mate..let me know if your"re interested...hope to hear from you soon...
Most of my spam of this nature has been w/out pics here lately, but at least this one sent some w/ this mail:
(Click any pic for larger view)
Dear Gifty,
You're a nice lookin' young woman, but as with most of these emails, I suspect you're actually some 37 yr. old Russian spammer sitting in a chilly flat in Moscow who lifted these photos off some poor girl's social media page and if we DID actually exchange emails, I'm sure you'll be wanting me to send you some money or at least to direct me to some pay-for-porn website.
Be that as it may, if you ARE actually "Gifty", I'd be less-than-honest if I didn't point out that I'm certainly old enough to be your grandfather. Thanks for the offer, though, but I'll have to pass.
"How do I feel"? More than a little wary, sweetheart. I'm just too old to deal with an STD at my age. That would be the Gifty than just keeps on giftying.
Regards,
Mike
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
