A PH.d of Spam

Every day I get several messages from a "Dr. Suzanne Gudakunst" telling me I'm fat. The mails are always from her, but she must have a zillion email addys because no two are ever from the same address.

(here are the ones that came today: DrSuzanneGudakunst@ochrebeige.com and DrSuzanneGudakunst@fernbramble.com. I hope the spambots grab 'em and deluge "her" inboxes the way "she" has done mine. I doubt it's really the Dr. Sue per se, but from the obnoxious affiliate program she sponsors)

However, the body of the mail is always the same:

Hello Subscriber,

It's me Dr. Suzanne G. here , and I wanted to let you know a very scary fact that every single person MUST be aware of if they every want to lose their fat:

Did you know the average person has 6-10 undigested meals resting in their colon?

Also, Every Single Person Has Disgusting Plaque and Horrible Little 'CRITTERS' Living in Their Colon!

I'm Going to Show You How to Get Rid of All of It so You Can Shed 10 lbs, 25 lbs, 50 lbs even 100 lbs or more - and Keep It Off FOREVER!!

The mail goes and provides a link to see for myself, plus a link and mailing address in order to opt out of the mailings.

Yeah, right.

I'm wondering something...if I have 6-10 undigested meals resting in my colon, isn't she simply saying I'm fulla crap? Also, why couldn't someone swap those horrible little 'critters' for one...say, a tapeworm?

That'd be the perfect pet, I'd think. Goes where you go, eats what you eat.

I'm not the only one who is wondering about Dr. Sue.

Sorry, Dr. Sue...there's no difference between your spam and what's in my colon.

I'm beginning to miss the porn spam, most particularly the ones that urge me to increase the size of a certain body part.